Father's Day Debate: Did You Marry Your Dad?

Love & Sex 21

father and sonLots of people joke that we are destined to marry someone like our dad — and when I was younger I thought "no way is that going to happen!" Not because there was anything wrong with my dad ... in fact, he was a very okay dad from a teenage girls point of view. Yeah, it was annoying that he sang every. single. morning. Mainly because it was my inheriting this very singing ability that got me rejected from Glee Club in 2nd grade! And it was slightly embarrassing when, at 13, I found a great red, black, and white winter coat that my dad liked so much he went and bought for himself. Yes, the. exact. same. coat. Torture for a teenager!

But ... marry someone like my dad? Phewy. Never!  I DID NOT want to marry someone like my dad. He made me listen to 50's music and watch cowboy movies. My future husband was going to be way cooler than my dad!  And then it happened ...

I married someone like my dad. Not exactly the same of course. My husband is a little taller and has better hair. And to be fair to my dad, he's never missed an exit because he just got lost in his thoughts; my husband has done that countless times. But the similarities are unquestionable:

1) They were both born on the same day, exactly 30 years apart.

2) At the time I met my now-husband he was working in the stock market (but has since, thankfully, changed careers) and so was my dad.

3) My dad has owned Honda Civics for as long as I can remember; my husband is currently still driving around in his prized, 1994, Toyota Camry. They are, essentially, the same freaking car.

4) Neither of them will ever let you down. If they say they are going to do something for you or with you — you can be damn sure it will happen.

5) Both were more than willing to change diapers (though my mom says my dad was wayyyy more willing to change his grand-children's diapers than he was when I was a baby!)

6) They both are easily obsessed with whatever their new "thing" of the moment is. Currently that "thing" is Words for Friends. Literally. Day and Night. Day and Night. Though my dad can use some more people to play with, so feel free to hit him up. Username: Davaut

7) They are both great communicators, in that they speak their minds but are also more than willing to talk and work things out. And with good communication, a long marriage is made a little easier. My parents will celebrate their 45th anniversary next week. My husband and I hope to be there one day too.

8) They are both amazing father's. I watch my husband wrestle with our kids and I have flashbacks to when my dad wrestled with my brothers and I. The laughter is contagious and the bumps are still easily healed with an ice-pack!

9) They put their family first, in front of work, in front of themselves.

10) Yes, they both can't sing. Sorry honey. Hopefully our kids will be a little less tone-deaf??

Inevitably, over the years, my father and my husband have taught each other a thing or two ... but my favorite is something my husband has taught my dad. He's taught him to hug. I don't mean just a little "lean in and pat" kind of hug ... I mean, he's taught him how to HUG! And now every single morning my two little ones give their grandpa the biggest hugs you can imagine. And it warms my heart to see them do that with the same man that used to tuck me in at night.

So, you see, I married my dad. And it worked out better than okay!


Did you marry someone like your dad?

dating, fathers day


To add a comment, please log in with

Use Your CafeMom Profile

Join CafeMom or Log in to your CafeMom account. CafeMom members can keep track of their comments.

Join CafeMom or Log in to your CafeMom account. CafeMom members can keep track of their comments.

Comment As a Guest

Guest comments are moderated and will not appear immediately.

Magen Kauffman

No I didn't. My dad, though I love him, is very stiff and not overly social. He has never been comfortable around other people. My hubby is the opposite. he has been known to strike up conversations with complete strangers and he makes friends easily.  I love them both, but for different reasons. The one thing they do have in common is that they are both great fathers!

Erin Allison Albany

My first husband had all of my father's negative qualities- most pronounce was their love of a certain less-than legal herb. They were both life-long potheads with bitterly negative attitudes. My first marriage taught me a lot about the struggles my mother faced and why she chose to end their marriage and leave myself and my brother to be raised by our father. The difference I chose was that I took my daughter back when my daughter was 9 and have been there to guide and support her through the times that will shape her choice to choose better partners in life and NOT repeat the struggles of the women before her.

Kimberly Virga

I did in a way. My father and my husband are both Virgos, my dad Aug 25 and my hubs Sept 7, so they share many similar qualities. They are both rational, calm, quiet people who are at the same time very social in their own way, people seem to gravitate towards them both. They seem to handle and settle problems in the same kinds of ways. So it is striking how similar they are.

monal... monalisasus

No. My dad is like Bob Vils, he can fix anything. In my house im the handy women and when i buy a house im gon na learn from him. My dad is also a conservative and wasnt that involved as a father, my hubby is superdad and a social demacrat. They share the loyal and respect traits when it comes to their families

Angie Maniaci

My husband shares some qualities with my dad:  they can both fix ANYTHING except computers.  Very convenient in a bad economy!  They both have a soft spot for kids and old people.  Would do anything for their kids, and have both never been able to stand up to their mothers.  The older my husband gets, the more he reminds me of my dad.


Ashleigh Munson

Yes they are basically the same person! I don't mind, my dad is awesome, and my husband is awesome, and they get along really well (obviously). Win!


jonellg jonellg

Not even close. The only thing they have in common is me.

kjbug... kjbugsmom1517

My husband and my dad couldn't be more different. Things that come to mind r my dad is handy, he can work on cars and handy work at the house, my husband not so much. My husband will talk to anyone and everyone about nothing, my dad not so much. One thing they do have in common is they will do anything for anyone and it doesn't matter what it costs. They r always willing to help someone out if they can. Seeing my girls love on there grampa melts my heart. Its opened my dads eyes to a whole new world.

Kasey Comingore

i don't know if they are alike, but they are both wonderful in their own ways!  my dad raised my sister and i from the tween years on by himself.  some things he didn't do well, other things he did great.  we are both daddy's girls.  and dh is a wonderful dad as well, and a great partner.

Alisi... Alisia61275

I did! My dad was a strong,stubborn,not very talkative,almost anti social person,but FIERCELY protective of his family,and so loving to them...and very funny! My husband is too! He is all of the above. The one thing he and I both regret is that he never met my dad. My father passed away in 2003 and my husband and I met in 2008. I wish he could have met him,they would have been great friends.....

1-10 of 21 comments 123 Last