We all knew the girl in high school who publicly claimed to be a virgin even though she was having all kinds of oral or anal sex in private. As long as she kept vaginal sex sacred, then she was a virgin. But I call BS.
It's all sex, it just goes by different names. Penetration is penetration and now, anal sex is more popular than ever. Done right, under the right set of circumstances, anal is a great addition to the sexual menu as it were. But to call it anything other than sex in a heterosexual relationship is to lie to oneself.
In fact, I would venture that anal sex is actually MORE intimate and sacred than vaginal sex. For many men, the "back door" is the ultimate conquest because so many women are against the idea, but as it grows in popularity, I really hope it doesn't become the new oral, i.e., something that women are desensitized to and don't consider "sex" at all.
I blame Bill Clinton. Back in the day he said he "did not have sex with that woman." What he meant was, he only had oral. And from that day forward, a new trend was born. But oral sex IS sex. And anal is even more.
Are we becoming more open or devaluing acts that are just as intense and "penetrating" as THE act itself? The fact is, anal sex can be a whole lot of fun and is certainly something homosexual couples have always done, but for heterosexual couples, only the most "adventurous" of women have been willing to try it.
There is no doubt it's worth a try. Many women find it to be extremely hot and it can lead to mind-blowing orgasms. But women should also feel like they're free to not engage in anal. As it becomes more and more normal, it makes me wonder not only what else will become taboo, but whether there will be a certain pressure to like it even if you don't.
By all means, experiment away, but don't pretend that anal is "nothing." It IS sex. And it's worth a try, but you also don't have to like it to still be viewed as a sexual and exciting woman.
Do you consider anal to be sex?
Image via gkdavie/Flickr
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