The decision of who we marry is probably the most important decision we will ever make in our lives. We make other commitments, of course -- buy real estate, get dogs, have children -- but the person with whom we walk down that aisle is the one who will be right next to us our whole lives.
So why do so many people do it so wrong? We are scared, it seems. We are scared of being alone, scared of not having kids, scared of a million things. But marrying the wrong guy leaves us more lonely than being alone. And one woman in England described for the Daily Mail just how. Writer Claire Lindsey who had her own disastrous first marriage says:
If I could offer advice to a bride-to-be or future groom who think they could be making a mistake, it would be to listen to those warning bells. Don’t ignore them.
So here are 9 signs you're marrying the wrong person:
- You aren't attracted to him: Guess what? This matters! If you don't want to rip his clothing off now, I promise you that you won't want him anymore when he's balding and covered in baby vomit. You had better be hot, hot, hot for him. Lukewarm does NOT a good marriage make.
- You feel superior to him: If his education level is lower or his job is more blue collar than yours, it doesn't matter. Unless, of course, it matters to you. If you find yourself embarrassed of him or making excuses or feeling shame, don't marry him. Run!
- He doesn't make you feel good: If he tells you that you need to lose a few, then you probably do: him! That's a good 200 pounds off right there. Seriously, you shouldn't be with a guy who makes you feel any less than the most attractive woman in the room.
- His values stink: If he doesn't think you need to talk to family or finish work or school or do something that matters to you, then maybe you ought to think twice before sharing a name with him.
- He is controlling: If he tells you what to do and that isn't what you like (in bed or out), then you might not want to put up with that for decades. Run while you still can.
- He shuts down: Communication is probably the most important part of any marriage. If you two aren't talking now, you sure as hell won't be talking later. Marry a talker and you won't be sorry.
- You don't think he is funny: My husband and I have been married eight years, together a decade now, and the number one reason I know we will never divorce is simple: We crack each other up. It might seem like a small thing, but if you can laugh even in hard times, you have a keeper. Period. End of story.
- He lies: If you catch him in lies, even small ones, tread lightly!
- Your family doesn't like him: If your mom who knows you better than anyone says run, then run!
What signs do you think are red flags for men?
Image via L.C.Nøttaasen/Flickr