William & Kate Invite 6 Ex-Flames to Wedding, Who Will Make a Scene?

Nicole Fabian-Weber
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kate and williamAh, the ol' invite your ex to your wedding. Gets 'em every time. Sure, it can be an awkward situation to broach with your significant other ("Honey, do you mind if I invite Steve to our wedding?" "Steve, who you lived with for two years and almost married, Steve? Let me think about that one."), but at the end of the day, if there's no bad blood, I say, "Why not?" And so does Prince William. And Kate Middleton. Triplets!

Between the two of them, there will be not one, not two, but SIX ex-flames at their royal wedding. And four of them are Wills'. Yowza. How many do you think will mouth "I do" the same time as Kate? No, in all seriousness, though, I predict these two will be together a long time because, dang, are they secure!

Let me tell you a little story. A few summers ago, I was at a barbecue with some friends. The sun was shining, the music was bumping, my vegan taco dip was going untouched. It was a good day. Anyway, one of my friends, who was there with her husband, started freaking out a bit when a dude she used to be in luuurve with walked in. And we're not talking a little crush here, we're talking full-on drunk crying spells to Mariah Carey's "We Belong Together" type of stuff. Her husband had heard Crush's name over the years here and there, and knew his wife was the victim of some serious unrequited love.

"Go over and talk to him," he said.

"What?" she said, and we all thought.

"Go over and talk to him. You're married, you're beautiful, show him what he missed out on."

I think that moment was the first time in history that six girls simultaneously fell in love with a man at the same time. I mean, how cool was this dude? How secure! Long story short, my friend never talked to the guy, but was thrilled to find out that he was an almost-twice divorced security guard at Target. And she and her husband continue to have a great marriage!

Jealousy is so not cute. I mean, think about it: If you were marrying Prince William, would you be more attracted to him if he threw a temper tantrum while brandishing his sword after you asked him if you could invite your ex? Or if he was like, "Yeah, sure," then casually went back to polishing his scepter. I think we both know the answer to that.

And don't try to tell me, "Maybe Kate is upset about it, but she's marrying a prince, so she has to just kowtow to his every need." Bull crap. They seem like a totally modern couple. And the dude's inviting four of his exes. If she were upset, there's no way he'd be inviting that many.

What do you think of there being royal exes at the Royal Wedding?

 

Image via americanistadechiapas/Flickr

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