New Divorce Trend Proves Married Women Let Themselves Go


Plastic surgery may not mend a broken heart, but that is not stopping divorcees from trying. A new trend in the UK, which has also made its way to the states, has women whose husbands left, especially those whose husbands cheated, going under the knife to make their ex envious.

It makes a lot of sense. How many of us look like the woman our husbands married? Years of marriage, age and children do a number on our looks and if we divorce, the idea of dating again in our current states would be daunting. The woman who married my husband at 25 was much hotter than the woman I am now, seven years (and two kids) later.

Certainly, it is a sad trend that women feel the need to alter their appearance surgically to feel better about themselves, but it is one that makes sense and if it helps, more power to them!

Lisa, the woman interviewed by the Daily Mail, said that she feels worlds better about herself and the divorce after getting her nails fixed, tummy tucked, a little bit of botox and more to improve her overall appearance. She says:

I’m virtually unrecognizable from the woman who went through such a bitter divorce four years ago. With each procedure, I felt my confidence increasing. I have never felt so unattractive and hurt as I did the morning my husband sat me down and told me that he’d met someone else. But having this work done was as if I were putting a metaphorical two fingers up to the man who had all but destroyed my life.

Plastic surgery does something tangible and real that talking to friends, venting and seeing a therapist does not. We can all say it is shallow and vain to go under the knife and in some ways, it probably is. But feeling better about oneself truly is the best revenge and this is the most obvious, quickest way to do so.

It is called 'vengeance surgery' and some clinics in the US actually offer packages for recently divorced women to spend their settlement money sprucing up their bods. But is this just preying on the weak?

The truth is, it IS opportunistic on the part of plastic surgeons to use women' low self esteem to sell surgery. But our low self esteem is not their fault. A better plan for us women is to not let ourselves go in the first place. Just because we are married is no reason to let our bodies become saggy and sad. Why not find the time to work out and apply makeup and stay in the fashion know?

We can't control aging and we can't control other people, but we can control our own happiness. If you do not feel you are attractive enough for another man, then you probably don't really feel you are attractive enough for your husband and it shows. All of us women should be taking more time for ourselves in the first place so that we don't need plastic surgery if he leaves us.

Would you feel OK dating after a failed marriage?



Image via  bethd821/Flickr

marriage, divorce


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nonmember avatar Step

I agree that not letting yourself go is the best policy, however, it will not prevent your husband from leaving of course. I'm 56 and don't expect to have the body of a 20 year old, but I'd be fine with 30 or 40. I made a promise to myself before I got married that I would never allow myself to just give up and look like I didn't care about my appearance. It has worked for the most part, sometimes I go without make up on camping trips or when I'm sick. Still married and coming up on 33 years soon.

bsawy... bsawyer84

It would depend on the nature of the divorce. If he left me and was a jerk about it then for sure! But if it was mutual and may be a long time.

charl... charlottej

Wow!  This "plastic surgery trend" by previously married women does not mean that they "let themselves go" any more than it means that divorced women hate themselves and want to be someone different. What a stupid and demeaning twist on statistics!  Way to make every married woman who refuses to go under the knife feel like she's "letting herself go."  Please don't "blog" if you're going to take a simple divorce stat and make women feel inadequate about being themselves. We don't need that shit.

Heather Swagga

Wow charlottej I didn't feel that that was the nature of the article at all. It's not "letting yourself go" not to go under the knife, it's letting yourself go when you spend everyday without trying to look at least decently good for yourself and your husband. I haven't had plastic surgery, but I dress nicely when my DH is home, and I try to take off food splattered clothes and add a touch of mascara. He appreciates the effort I make in not being sloppy every day all day.

I think that was the point trying to be made by the writer, to look decently good and try to still keep the spark in your marriage, with or without surgery being involved.

autod... autodidact

how many men look like the man their wives married? 

nonmember avatar Christine

I look nothing like I did 6 years ago when I met my husband. Not only have I had our daughter, but I am a mental eater and I have been under tons of stress for a little over a year now and have gained about 30 pounds. I am not saying any of this is good, BUT, how I currently look does not make my husband love me any less. My husband loves me for my dorky inner qualities and I could be purple, weigh 500 pounds and smell like rotten fish and he would still love me, as I would still love him. Our marriage is not based on outer looks.

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