Love on The Bachelor was trotted out for the first time last night. Chantal told Brad she loved him after their wet and wild Costa Rican adventure. They went zip-lining and Chantal fell head over heels for the man.
It's always so hard to tell time in The Bachelor world. They live in what appears to be a timeless "snow" globe where the weather is always either sunny or pouring romantic rain and they rarely require jackets. With all the missing girls, though, I'm going to go ahead and assume that they've been there about three to four weeks. The show takes about six weeks to film and they seem a little more than halfway done. Again, it's hard to tell.
But even six weeks is way too early for love unless you have spent a lot of time together, which, by the end of filming, they haven't.
Saying "I love you" too soon can be a bad thing. There is no right or wrong in love and no one can possibly say how soon is really too soon. But a good general rule of thumb is about two months of exclusive dating.
My dating rule was two months and always after he said it. I broke that rule once (with my now husband) and I can't tell you how dumb I felt for saying it first even to this day. In my defense I had been drinking and we were in bed, but it was still a mistake. It took him another three weeks to say it to me and it was an agonizing three weeks. There were a few times I almost dumped him out of sheer worry that he didn't feel as strongly as I did.
Now, to hear him talk, he was bothered by how quickly I said it. We were six weeks into a rather complicated beginning. Both of us had been in prior relationships with people we weren't that into, but getting out of them was intricate and ugly. It probably was too soon, but I did love him and, look, it worked out, right? We are still together 10 years later.
So maybe Chantal isn't saying it too soon. Maybe she really is in love. And if you read the spoilers (which I have ... SPOILER ALERT), then you know that she has a very good chance of being the last one standing. There is, as we know, always the exception. But let's face it, Bachelor romances that last are few and far between. Most fall apart within months of filming and that's because (gasp!) real feelings don't evolve in these false circumstances of beautiful backdrops, group dates, and hours of time together.
Real love takes time. Sure, you can fall in love in three weeks, but not with a man you only see twice. I was in love with my husband, it's true. But we had spent every waking second together, only leaving each other to go to work, for more than five weeks, and we had been friends before that. You can fall in love quickly. But not on The Bachelor. Chantal shouldn't have said that.
Do you think she made a mistake?
Image via ABC