Celebrity Wedding Officiants: Who's for Hire

Amy Keyishian
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Reverend Run
Reverend Run now pronounces you ...
Most of us settle for Father McDermott or whoever comes with the house of worship that’ll look best in the wedding photos. But some brave souls track down celebrities like director Kevin Smith, Reverend Run (pictured, of Run-DMC), or actor Jason Segel to officiate at their weddings.
 
On the one hand, why not? These days, most people seem to worship at the altar of celebrity. And if you don’t happen to have a relationship with a clergy-person, why not invite someone who will really make the day memorable? On the other hand, are you kidding me? Like weddings aren’t enough of a circus!
 
If you’re thinking of having a celebrity perform your wedding, here are a few folks I'd like to suggest -- some better than others.

Oprah:
Can you imagine having the wisdom of the ultimate daytime-talk-show queen pervading your special day? Of course, your husband would be totally left out of the whole deal, but everyone in your wedding party would get a car! Never mind that Oprah’s never been married. Neither has Father McDermott!
 
Lady Gaga:
On the other hand ... if it’s spectacle rather than words of wisdom you want, you could go with Stefani Germanotta. And everyone could fry up her outfit for the buffet. I really like this idea!
 
James Franco:
He’s an actor. A grad student. An Oscar co-host. A screenwriter. A painter. An author. Do you really think it’d be much of a stretch for him to study up on marriage vows? Trouble is, the bride would be lusting after the officiant. Not kosher.
 
Mel Gibson:
I mean, the guy was married for 20-some years and spawned a huge family while espousing family values! Who better to start your marriage off ... wait, what? He did? With who? And a baby? And then he what? Sheesh! Never mind.
 
Larry King:
He’s been married eight times! Who knows weddings better than him? Plus, he’s retiring, so he’s available, right?
 
James Earl Jones:
If Darth Vader says you’re married -- oh, you’re married all right.

If I could have anyone perform my wedding -- I mean besides our beloved rabbi, who did perform ours, and was very good-natured about a prank I pulled on him at the altar (yeah, I know, my mom couldn’t believe it either) -- it would be the actor Peter Cook, otherwise known as The Impressive Clergyman:
 

What celeb would officiate at your wedding?


 
Image via RevRunWisdom/Twitter

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