Women & Their Dogs ... & the Men Who Date Them

Amy Kuras

It's not so hard to score points with your boyfriend or husband at Christmas. A big, lavish gift he's not expecting, like golf clubs or a new guitar, always works if you can afford it, but so do thoughtful smaller gestures that show we're paying attention, like his favorite candy in his stocking or a subscription to a science magazine if that's his thing.

Basically, guys want what we want, to have our significant other notice our likes and dislikes and buy us gifts accordingly. What they don't want is to come in second after the dog ... a distant second.

This story from a British actress I've never heard of kind of made my blood boil. She cheerfully talks about how she's spent about a hundred pounds on her boyfriend -- and six times that on her dog. Her bulldog is getting a cashmere blanket, handmade dog biscuits, various winter outfits, and a skateboarding lesson. He's getting a shirt and a pair of cuff links ... in the shape of the dog.

There's your proof: dog people are nuts.

She may not be the worst girlfriend ever, although bragging about how much of an afterthought her significant other is puts her squarely in the running, but there are other ways to capture that crown, holiday-wise:

-- Buy him cute boxers, when he wears briefs. If you're close enough to be buying him underwear, you should know what kind he wears.

-- Re-gift anything anyone's given you. If you're too broke to buy him a gift, bake his favorite cookies, offer to take a task he hates off his hands (like shopping for his mom), or make him sex coupons. If someone gave you something you don't like but he might, offer it to him, but not as a gift. (For very new boyfriends, this can be waived.)

-- Invite him to your family holiday gathering and either ignore him or criticize him in front of them. Bonus points if any of your exes are also in attendance.

-- Guilt him into attending your religious service, or insult his.

-- Give him something you actually want. Guys are famous for this, but ladies, we're not above it. Ask my husband who used the peppermint body scrub he got one year, even though the package was very guy-centric (in my defense, I got him better stuff too).

-- Give him any passive-aggressive gifts: Diet books, etiquette guides, workout DVDs, etc. If he's asked for them, fine ... if he hasn't, step away from the self-help section.


What's your sweetie getting this year?


Image via istolethetv/Flickr

Read More