Rules for Having Sex in Someone Else's House

Jennifer Cullen

EarHaving vacation sex is one of the many benefits of going away alone with your husband or partner.

Vacation sex is usually great. You're away from the stresses of your everyday life. No kids, no cooking, cleaning, or working.

But what if you're staying at someone's house? Say, the house of a cousin, college friend, or even your grandparents.

Is the vacation sex going to be as good as if you were staying in a hotel?

It can be. But you have to get the lay of the land, so to speak, when you get there.

  • The first thing to do is figure out where their bedroom is in relation to yours. Next door, directly below, or far enough away that you don't have to worry. Then, check to see if sounds coming from your room will be audible to them. Have your husband go out into the hall while you make moaning noises and see if he can hear you.
  • Also, be sure and check if the rooms share an air vent. Trust me. Sound travels through those things. It's happened to me before. A few years ago, my husband and I spent the night at a friend's house. We all had lunch the next day before we drove home. While we were sharing the meal, my friend made some snide comment about what time my husband and I went to bed. To the minute. It took me a few seconds but I figured out how she knew that. Oops.
  • The best set-up to have at someone else's house? An en-suite bathroom. Trust me, hopping semi nude to a bathroom down the hall, while trying not to make too much noise or allowing any leakage mess, takes away from the post-coital feeling of bliss.

Ultimately, you shouldn't care if your hosts know that you and your husband are doing the deed. Everybody does it at some point. And they should be happy for you. I know I'm happy when my house guests get it on. Unless, of course, the guests happen to be my parents.

Plus being in the mood can be contagious. Last year, at a week long family gathering, my husband and I started a trend. He and I mysteriously disappeared for a little bit. When we returned to the public space in the house, we got a few winks and nods. Over the next few hours, the mood in the house was elevated to an unprecedented level of euphoria. Without the help of prescription drugs.

One non-negotiable rule? Please strip your own bed before you leave.

Are you uncomfortable having sex at someone else's house?


Image via laverrue/Flickr

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