Poor David Arquette. He and Courteney Cox enter a separation agreement that's legally binding, and he can't even go out and get a little legal nookie without people pointing fingers.
In the midst of blabbing his big mouth on Howard Stern this week, Arquette may not have made the best case for a marriage repair, but he did prove it's time America drop its puritanical obsession with Jasmine Waltz.
What is with these Friends girls and their zealots fans? For such rabid fandom, they should know chapter and verse of the the whole "we were on a break" episode.
A little history: Jennifer Aniston's Rachel tells David Schwimmer's Ross it's time to take a break in their relationship. Heartbroken Ross does the guy thing and makes himself feel better in the arms (and bed?) of a girl from the local copy store. Rachel finds out, plays the pity-poor-me card, and doofy Ross spends the next 100 episodes yelling, "We were on a break!" at random moments to defend himself against her sanctimony.
How she wins any of those "favorite Friends character polls" is beyond us.
According to David's timeline, he was already separated from Courteney when he bumped uglies with Waltz the waitress.
Ladies, you can't have it both ways. If you call for a separation, legally, you're not with one another anymore. You may get back together. Or you may be headed for Splitsville, population 2.
But right now, you're two singles swinging in the breeze, trying to pick a direction. How better to make the divorce decision than to play the field and find out if absence really has made the heart grown fonder? Which frees his peepee for the rest of the fish in the sea.
If he has sex with her, he's not cheating. He's exploring his options.
And you get the do the same.
So you may be wishing Monica Geller Courteney Cox was your bestie, but let's cut the righteous indignation on her behalf. David Arquette's not a eunuch. He's a guy trying to figure out if he and his wife can make it back to husband and wife.
And he's having a little fun along the way.
Image via The Delicious Life/Flickr