Karen Owen with friendDuke University is buzzing about Karen F. Owen's f**k list, a PowerPoint presentation, no less. The recent grad created an impressive 42-page document titled "Senior Honors Thesis" on her drunken (mostly) sexual exploits with Duke athletes.
It's a thorough report including quantifiable methods of ranking each subject, anatomic details, and sext transcripts. If I had been Karen Owen's friend, I would have been impressed, if not disturbed, by Owen's attention to detail and memory recall. As an outsider, it makes me feel dirty. While Owen only sent it to three friends, as a person under the age of 60, she should know that once something is distributed electronically, it doesn't matter if you send it to one person, or one hundred.
Jezebel interviewed Owen, who is seemingly mortified that her list is now the topic of national attention, yet she did point out that frat guys have been doing this for years.
She's right, but does that make it okay?
In order to buy the argument that this is somehow gender equality, you have to accept that men are aggressive and take what they want with no regard for the feelings of women. Of course, the Duke lacrosse team, many of whom Owen bedded, already have that reputation. You also have to buy the argument that women are weak and have little control over their sexual choices. Owen's treatment of these men negates that stereotype, as do 99% of the women I know.
So even though the expert on the TODAY show annoyed the hell out of me as she spoke of being very disappointed in girls losing their modesty (note, not frat boys -- that's just to be expected) and seemed concerned about "morals," we cannot have a double standard. It's not okay to sexually humiliate anyone. Even if you think these testosterone-fueled athletes on the prowl really, really deserve it. What if Subject #2 killed himself after reading her assessment of his personality and penis?
I'm all for owning your sexuality. But being proud of getting hammered and going home with a similarly inebriated jock is as much of an accomplishment as finding a liberal on campus. Subjecting your targets to public scrutiny when you made the choice to get on that tiny, flaccid penis is bad behavior. No matter who you're bedding.
Do you think it's okay that Karen Owen showed this list to friends?