10 Most Annoying Husband Habits

17

Toilet seatDoes your spouse do something on a daily basis that annoys the heck out of you?

It doesn't matter how much you love him, how long you've been married, or how good of a father he is. He can be the most generous, caring person.

But he's only human.

As his wife, you have to pick and choose your battles. Pick one or two, or maybe even five, of his bad habits and try to change them. But remember, it's not easy to teach an old, snoring Mastiff new tricks. But you can have fun trying.

Here are the 10 top annoying things husbands do. And some helpful hints to try to break him of them:

1. Annoying habit: Chews with his mouth open even when you're eating at someone else's house.

Fix: Buy a pot-bellied pig and sit it at the table with you so your husband can see what he looks like. If you don't want to purchase the pig, secretly videotape him at the dinner table. One evening, when he thinks the two of you are going to watch some porn, play the video montage you created so he can see what he looks like.

2. Annoying habit: He snores like there's a big giant drooling Mastiff in bed next to you.

Fix: Buy him some Breathe Right strips, have him do a nightly nasal saline rinse, or send him to the ENT doctor. Maybe he has a deviated septum. If all else fails, get earplugs.

3. Annoying habit: Picks his fingernails, sometimes with a folded up dollar bill.

Fix: Every time you see him picking, start singing, "I'm in the money." And then keep the money. That will start to get annoying.

4. Annoying habit: Mixes plaids and stripes. And thinks it makes him look hip.

Fix: Go through his closet and arrange his clothes for him in a Garanimals-like manner.

5. Annoying habit: Leaves the toilet seat up. Every single time.

Fix: Sorry, this annoying habit is older than the stars. And I don't think that there is anything that can be done to stop it, other than gluing down the seat.

6. Annoying habit: Leaves his dirty clothes on the floor next to his bed. Or next to the hamper. Or on the floor of his closet.

Fix: Just don't wash anything that doesn't make it to the dirty clothes hamper. When he runs out of clean underwear, tell him you washed everything that was in the hamper.

7. Annoying habit: Leaves his dirty dishes not in the dishwasher and not even in the sink. But right next to the sink. Every single night.

Fix: Treat it like the laundry and let his dishes pile up. Eventually, he'll get it.

8. Annoying habit: Imitates the Geico Insurance Guy all the time. "Could switching to Geico really save you 15% or more on car insurance?" And it's not even a good imitation.

Fix: Constantly do your imitation of Flo, the Progressive Insurance girl. And don't do it well. He may actually think the role play is sexy and propose a merger of the two companies. Then the habit won't be so annoying.

9. Annoying habit: Leaves his shaved facial hair all over the sink and bathroom counter.

Fix: Collect the shavings for a period of time, then glue them to your chest one night before the two of you go out. The gross-out factor will put an end to that.

10. Annoying habit: Sits on the couch watching sports and pretends he's listening to you. And says "uh huh" every once in a while.

Fix: Tell him you're going shopping and out to dinner. See how long it takes for him to realize you're gone. When he calls and asks where you are, you can honestly say, "I told you I was leaving."

Is this list missing one of your husband's annoying habits?

 

Image via Jennifer Cullen 


marriage, chores

17 Comments

To add a comment, please log in with

Use Your CafeMom Profile

Join CafeMom or Log in to your CafeMom account. CafeMom members can keep track of their comments.

Join CafeMom or Log in to your CafeMom account. CafeMom members can keep track of their comments.

Comment As a Guest

Guest comments are moderated and will not appear immediately.

truth... truthrowan

I don't see how #7 is annoying, I HATE having dirty dishes in my sink that I just have to empty it out before washing. I bought a dishpan to keep the dirty dishes in so I don't have to clean out my sink before I fill it up (No dishwasher here folks except for Me) but no one will use it. The rest my husband either doesn't do or doesn't bother me. He doesn't watch sports, but I learned long ago to wait for his match to end when he's playing  a game before wasting my time talking to him.

RanaA... RanaAurora

My husband does NOT do the dishes, even if I buy paper plates and plastic silverware and say, "I'm not cooking until dishes are done."  Trust me, I've tried.


As far as snoring, I push or pull his pillow until he adjusts.


Toilet seat... you're just as capable of putting it down as he is at lifting it up. ;)


My husband's annoying habit is NOT RESPONDING when people talk to him, but being irritated when you repeat your question.  Solution? Frying pan to the head.

Sweet... SweetPieMama24

I got tired of washing so many dishes, especially when the stepchildren come over. So I got paper plates - and my husband would put THEM into the sink! As if I'm gonna wash them!!!!

Nellyo Nellyo

Hmm, I dont think the boyfriend does any of those. 


Before I knew I was pregnant, I came home early from work (in the Army, at least in my unit, its nearly impossible to get the day off) because I was feeling like CRAP. I was throwing up, coughing until I threw up, etc.


I came home, still in boots and smelly uniform, sat on the sofa and just about passed out. Boyfriend asked if I was home for lunch and I told him I have been feeling AWFUL and got quarters for the next two days for vomiting and migraines (again, hard to get quarters, and he knows that as he spent 10 years in the Army as well).


He then proceeded to ask if I wanted to go out into the yard and help him prepare the ground for new sod.


DID YOU NOT JUST HEAR ME? I was sent home from work for vomiting and migraines and I feel yucky. What part of that translates into YES, I want to go work on the backyard...?


His mind is 30 places at once. I know he wants to listen, I know he tries to listen, but when he has a project on the brain, thats ALL he can think about. Grrr. I just have to tell him to slow down or tell him before I start: babe, this is really important...


I feel kind of lucky that he doesnt do all those things listed above ;)

hotic... hoticedcoffee

My husband used to do #6, thinking I'd wander around looking for his dirty laundry so I could wash it.  Puh-lease.  The day he realized what was going on, he had to go to work in a dirty undershirt and dress shirt (lucky for him he has about 200 pairs of underwear).  He not only gets his laundry in the basket now, he makes sure the basket gets to the laundry room for me.

nonmember avatar Allboys

He is guilty of number four. So I fixed it by throwing away all the clothes I hated and pretending I didn't know what happened to them. He just noticed he had no clothes left so we went and got him new ones. Which he then asked my opinion on. His number one habit that gets me fired up is forgetting an appointment and springing it on me the day of when I had things planned. We are working on it with blunt honesty, kindness and a calendar.

nonmember avatar Leah

Putting the seat down:

When my husband and I met I noticed he always put the seat down, I told asked him one night; "How on Earth did your mother manage to teach you that?"

his answer:
"My sister showed me a Mythbusters video on youtube about leaving the seat up, truly disgusting"

Jeremiah Stanton

You people need to know that you have just as many if not more bad habits then he does

Anna Robertson

My husband leaves all the cabinet doors open. He will reach in, pull a dish and then leave the door wide open. I hit my head on a corner so many times I don't care to count. Even he walked into the lower door and yet it still didn't register.
He also snores, leaves his toilet seat up, dirty clothes on the floor and dirty dishes wherever he happens to eat. And he likes clothes, so by the time he runs out of them , it becomes an incredible nuisance.

nonmember avatar mariah g

hahaha i found 8& 9 absolutely hilarious. i wont try the fixes but i got a good laugh

1-10 of 17 comments 12 Last