Amy FisherOh, Amy Fisher. I wondered what rock you'd been hiding under? Now we all know, you're 36 years old and all grown up, married, mom of three, and, wow, a budding porn star with an eight-film contract, no less.
We are so proud of you -- all of us who devotedly watched the three made-for-TV movies about you (starring Drew Barrymore! then Alyssa Milano! and that unknown actress who played you best!). I mean, we can't really say "you've come a long way, baby" or anything, but hey, you did your time for your horrific crime and now you're doing what you need to do. If you have to be shooting something, better porn than innocent women, I guess.
One thing, though, we really think you need a better porn name. Amy Fisher just ain't doing it, especially up against your co-stars' names: Tommy Gunn and Dale Dabone.
Here are our ideas.
10 Better Porn Star Names for Amy Fisher
- Long Island Lolita. Obvious maybe but synonymous with Amy Fisher and way more sexy.
- Lethal Lolita. Perhaps more appropriate.
- Lady Tata. Well, she had them made larger for a reason, right?
- Amy Buttafuoco. Too bad she and Joey didn't marry because his name is a shoe-in for a porn star name. I feel dirty just typing it. Maybe he'll let her borrow it.
- Mama XXX. One 'X' for each of her kids.
- Amy Fi$her. Money symbols are nice.
- Lay-me Fisher. Sort of cute.
- Bang Bang. She has proven to the world she knows how to use a gun and well, this word has its own special meaning in the porn industry, too.
- Jail Bait. She was and always will be.
- Amy Fisher. On second thought, maybe she's onto something using her given name. This name does ooze that well-earned "bad girl" image that will probably sell her flicks. Or maybe it's the naked dirty sex stuff that will sell them, but whatever.
Got any creative name ideas for Amy as she sets off on her newest venture?
Image via AmyFisher.com (visit with caution - adult)