So ... Do YOU Think Masturbation Is Adultery?

Sasha Brown-Worsham

If you want to improve your marriage, there's no better way than to let your fingers do the walking ... right down into your own pants.

And although Christine O'Donnell, who has made headlines this week not only for her surprising victory in the race for the Republican nomination for U.S. Senate in Delaware, but also for calling masturbation "adultery" back in 1996, might tell you that you're wrong, you aren't.

After all, masturbation isn't adultery if it makes you a better lover. Besides, Christine O'Donnell isn't married, which doesn't really make me want to listen to her about adultery anyway. Let's not let the "anti-masturbation candidate" get you down. Masturbation is a fun, safe way to learn about your body so you can use those tips with your spouse.

Contrary to O'Donnell's claims about masturbation inspiring lust and being a form of adultery, it actually can stop adulterous behavior.

Oh yes. It can.

"It's a perfectly normal human sexual behavior," Richard Carroll, director of the Sex and Marital Therapy Program at the Northwestern Medical Faculty Foundation, told the Washington Post. "Surveys show that two-thirds of men regularly masturbate, and about 60 percent of women regularly masturbate as well. Plenty of people use masturbation as an entirely appropriate sexual outlet."


A few reasons:

  • Better, faster orgasms: Whether you use your hand, a vibrator, a water spout, or some other means, a good masturbator can get you off in a few minutes, which trains the body to do the same thing during sex, thus increasing the likelihood of multiples in a single sex session.
  • Uncovering what you really want: Instead of fumbling about with a variety of different men or women, masturbation narrows your focus to one person -- yourself. What turns you on? What gets you hot? Bring that back to the marital bed and sparks will fly!
  • Extra tools: Use that vibrator both on your own and with your spouse and experiment with how much more both of you can enjoy it. Masturbate in front of one another and see what a strange and awesome thing that can be. You learn more about each other by watching what turns him on and vice versa.
  • Satisfying: If you and your spouse have different sex drives, masturbation is a great way to keep you both fulfilled. He wants it, you don't? He can go off and help himself, which makes him a lot less likely to seek out someone else.
  • A little freedom goes a long way: Look, we are part of a couple. We aren't one person. Much as we love our spouses, a little freedom now and then is kind of nice. Masturbation is a safe way to explore that separation without the cost of actually being adulterous.

Do you consider masturbation adultery?


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