How Dead People Can Improve Your Sex Life

Jennifer Cullen
6

needleI love my gynecologist. Some people may say I love him too much. But even I have my limits. I really don't want to play "find the G-spot" with him.

But if I wanted to get the G-Shot, and an enlarged G-spot, I would have to.

The G-Shot is an injection of collagen directly into your G-spot, the area of the vagina that's home to an intense erogenous zone, to increase its size.

The larger your G-spot, the easier it will be for either you or your partner to make contact with it and will theoretically lead to you having more vaginal orgasms and, in turn, more sexual satisfaction.

The collagen used for the G-Shot is similar to the type used to reduce facial wrinkles and plump up lips. It is bioengineered and comes from a human donor, meaning a cadaver. The freeze-dried, irradiated tissue of a dead person.

Okay, so there's two reasons for me not to get the G-Shot. One, cadaver collagen injected into my vagina with a long, sharp needle. And two, it's injected specifically into a spot marked by my gynecologist after I masturbated in front of him in order to show him where my G-spot was.

If you don't have an issue with either semi-public masturbation or being injected with a dead person's tissue and get the shot, you'll have an enlarged G-spot for up to 4 months. But it'll cost you approximately $1,200 each time.

The consent form for the procedure details the risks associated with it. My favorite? That the G-Shot causes some of its recipients to have "a sensation of always being sexually aroused."

That doesn't sound too bad as far as risks go but there are times when this might cause a problem. Like when I'm sitting in temple on Yom Kippur atoning for my sins. Or attending a parent-teacher conference at my kids' school with my ex-husband.

No, I think I'll stick to the old-fashioned way of deriving my sexual satisfaction. Manually.

Plus, we've all seen what happens when women get too much collagen injected into their lips. It's not pretty. And I don't want to have to change the name of my vagina to Lisa Rinna.

Would you get the G-Shot?

 

Image via Andres Rueda/Flickr


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