Do You Believe in 'Love at Last Sight'?

Jennifer Cullen

Love at last sight bookLove at Last Sight sounds like another book written about vampires. But it's not.

It's a book written by Kerry and Chris Shook subtitled 30 days to grow and deepen your closest relationships. The premise? That love at first sight is only the beginning of a relationship. And that the best relationships need more than chemistry to reach their potential.

Relationships need to pass through two phases the Shooks call First Glance (the honeymoon phase) and Second Look (the reality phase) in order to reach Last Sight (the ultimate relationship goal).

As the Shooks write, when your relationship reaches Last Sight, it means that "the last time we see each other on this earth we're closer than ever before."

Sounds good to me.

To help you get there, the book takes you through a 30-day program complete with daily "homework."

Though the title made me curious, I lost some interest when I first started glancing through the chapters. I'm Jewish. The Shooks are Christian and the book contains many references to the New Testament.

But I continued reading and ultimately thought the book had a lot to offer. I didn't complete the daily exercises the way the Shooks suggested. Instead, I picked up some ideas that would help me make my relationship with my husband better. We have a strong marriage but there's always room for improvement.

Some of my favorite ideas from the book:

  • Be all there for each other. Sitting next to your spouse while he's watching the horse races on TV and you're texting on your iPhone doesn't count as being together. Do an activity that actively includes both of you like going for a walk together.
  • Support each other. Know the dreams of your spouse and encourage them, even cheer them on, to fulfill those dreams. My husband is my biggest fan and he frequently makes that known. His support feels great.
  • Work at being a team. A true relationship is a partnership, one in which the two people complement each other's strengths and weaknesses. We are better together rather than separate.
  • Let go of your resentments. This is one of the biggest things I need to work on. The Shooks advise three steps for this: admit you have been hurt, tell that person how you feel, and then forgive them. I've already used the step-by-step process and it has been helpful.

What has helped you develop a closer relationship with your spouse?


Image via Barnes & Noble

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