Not in the Mood? Try Doing It Anyway

Jennifer Cullen

Romantic coupleIt's a common scenario. One that plays out all over the world, usually in a bedroom. A man wants to have sex. The woman says, "Not tonight, I have a headache."

There have been a multitude of studies done on the difference in sex drives between men and women. And many of these studies have shown that, yes, men have stronger sex drives than women. And yes, sex is more complicated for women. More cerebral and emotional.

I like having sex with my husband. Love it even. I really, really do. But I know that we don't do it as often as he would like to. Sure a good orgasm makes me feel good, giddy even. But it shoots him straight to the moon. Like he took a prescription-strength mood enhancer.

Our lives are busy these days. And it's all good things. Kids, work, household chores, kids. Sometimes I just have too much to do. Or too much going on inside my head. I've been described as having a mind that never stops. Which I think is a good thing except when it's time to slow down.

So what do you do if your partner wants to have sex and you don't? Say you have a headache and go to bed? Your mind is still going to keep running. Or do you have sex to make your partner happy and hope it doesn't take long?

Hopefully neither. Because what ends up happening to me once we start fooling around is that my mind miraculously slows down. I don't remember why I would ever have said no.

By the end of our intimate session, I feel more relaxed, closer to my husband, and I actually sleep better. Now if I could just remember that for the next time.

Does your mind get in the way of your sex life?

Image via Mercedes..Life as I Pictured/Flickr

Read More