I love board games, card games, sports games ... I hate dating games.
I'm so over it and just want to be completely myself around a guy that I dig. Yes, I realize that the right guy for me won't play games; therefore, I don't have to either. But unfortunately, it seems the majority of 20- and 30-somethings in NYC are professional players, and not partaking in these games have resulted in numerous fails on my part. So just give me the damn dice.
Here are five dating games that I truly despise, but continue to take part in:
- The "exclusive excuse" game: This is what I say when the physical part of the "relationship" gets heavier. My rule is I don't have sex with anyone that I'm not exclusive with. As in, boyfriend-girlfriend exclusive. You'd be surprised at just how many guys seem to fall off the planet after being told that (actually, no, you probably wouldn't). So, unless I want my number to rival that of Warren Beatty's, I stick to it. I hate having to play this game, believe me, I usually want it as bad as he does, but it's a way of filtering out the guys that aren't looking for the same thing that I am.
- The "I'm so busy" game: I'm not a big social butterfly during the week. My days and nights are pretty predictable: work, come home, eat dinner, go to the gym, snuggle with Scout the Cat while watching bad reality TV, go to bed. But, so as not to seem too available, I have to pretend that I'm out having a super fabulous time on a Tuesday night, when in fact I'm on my couch in my PJs.
- The text/call challenge: Oh, I'm sooo bad at this one. I have to consciously keep myself from texting someone if I really like him, oftentimes adding in a DO NOT TEXT after his name in my contact list. If I like someone, I want to talk to him. But, in boy terms it shows clinginess, so I play the game.
- Always looking perfect: It takes me approximately 1 hour and 15 minutes to look my absolute best. That's a long time! But as long as I feel like I'm still trying to hook the guy, I want him to ogle me, to want me, to make him realize that I'm hotter than the other girls he's dating. I don't want to even think about how many hours of my life I've wasted on straightening my hair just to meet up with a guy for an afternoon stroll. In reality, I'd much rather be in sweats (preferably his sweatshirt), sans makeup, snuggling on the couch.
- No talk of the past: Obviously, I'm not going to blab about my ex-boyfriend on a first date, but I don't understand what the harm is of sharing intimate details of your past with someone you like. But too much too soon sends them running.
Do you ever feel forced to play games when you first start dating someone? Which one do you have the most trouble with?
Image via Pistols Dawn/Flickr