Are you there for your ex?Once upon a time, there was a beautiful princess with a pointy chin who married Prince Charming, who turned out to like strip clubs too much. The princess was awarded a golden statue, which, as we all know, makes marriages dissolve into thin air ... and so they split in 2006.
But the story doesn't end there. While the rest of the kingdom mutters about how Ryan Phillippe will always remain a cad, he insists, via The Howard Stern Show, that he and Reese Witherspoon are good friends now -- able to co-parent and even comfort each other during rocky romantic times. "After I had my breakup [with Abbie Cornish], she called, and after she had hers [from Jake Gyllenhaal], I did," he says.
I'm friends with several exes, much to the chagrin of my husband. (He doesn't really object, but he does get annoyed, especially about the one he knows really did me wrong.) And I'll admit, I get a charge out of doling out relationship advice and patting their shoulders (virtually), though it's odd to think that a fella who once considered me sexual napalm now calls me his "Jiminy Cricket." But I wouldn't have it any other way -- he still loves motorcycles and dresses in Harley-Davidson drag, and I've got one and a half kids he had no interest in fathering. Somehow the distance makes it safe for me to talk lady-friends with him, though I wouldn't return the favor -- were I to have a major relationship rift with Randy, I wouldn’t run to that ex, or any other, for comfort.
In a very small sample poll of my friends, most express horror at the idea of getting relationship advice from an ex. "I broke up with him because he's clueless about relationships," one says. "I could never be vulnerable with her -- she'd probably tell our kids all my business," another complains.
But if it's possible -- if you can get to that place of friendship -- confiding in an ex could be a great thing. After all, you spent years together, you have tons of shared history, and you know each other better than almost anyone else. If nothing else, you can be the one to say, "I know you're strong and you'll get through this," because if anyone can survive losing you ... well, that couldn't have been easy, right?
Would you confide in an ex? Tell us in the comments!