Bride Wants Fiancé to Ditch Best Man for Being 'Honest' About Why He's Making a Mistake


best man speech

There is no doubt that bridezillas often make wild demands. We've heard just about everything when it comes to these future Mrs. -- they tend to err on the wild side when it comes to their wishes. However, one bride-to-be's demand that her husband find a new best man is pretty reasonable, considering how he's been acting lately.

  • The woman and her fiancé, Peter, have been together for 7 years, and plan to tie the knot in 2021. 

    "Peter has this friend (M28), whom we’ll call Matt, they're childhood friends and have always been close, so it was only logical that Peter would want Matt to be his best man, which I was totally on board with (we even threw him a surprise 'proposal')," the bride wrote. "Matt agreed without much enthusiasm, and on condition that he'd be allowed to always tell what he was thinking."

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  • It was from that moment on that Matt started spoiling the couple's engagement.

    "Anytime we would get together he would ALWAYS, without fail, bring the subject of marriage and how he absolutely didn't believe in it, that he thought Peter was making a mistake and would be better off dumping me and sleeping with random girls," she wrote.

    "Peter talked to him multiple times, and each time he said that he'd been allowed to speak his truth and so we couldn't ask him to shut up. Peter began talking about choosing another best man, and was (still is) pretty conflicted about it but had always envisioned his wedding with Matt by his side. I really want to respect that and I encouraged him to have a conversation with Matt. At that point Matt calmed down for a while and I thought all was well."

  • When they saw Matt again for the first time in a while, he started up his anti-marriage antics. Only this time he crossed a major line. 

    "My fiance's brother asked us for pictures that he could use during his speech, and while Peter went to find some, Matt said that he would be, again, 'speaking his truth' during his toast and wasn't afraid to say at the wedding that he didn't believe in marriage," she wrote

     "He then proudly announced that he would be hiring a prostitute for the bachelor party to 'test' Peter and that he was planning on doing everything he could to push him to the edge and make him cheat on me and realize he was making a mistake. I have complete trust in my fiance and I don't doubt his fidelity but I was so hurt that his best man would try something like that."

  • That's when the bride-to-be totally lost it. 

    "I was angry and hurt and asked Peter to uninvite him, because I couldn't imagine having my wedding with him around," she admitted. "It's also my day and I don't want to spend it hearing about how my fiance is making a mistake marrying me. I also don't want my family to be forced to sit through a toast basically humiliating me. I want this day to be a happy one, to be about us and our commitment to each other and not about the best man's disbelief in marriage."

  • Peter is seriously torn on whether or not he should kick Matt out.

    "Mutual friends are taking Matt's side and saying I don't have a say in my fiance's choice of best man," the bride said. "I am hurt and scared & most of all sad that this moment that should be so exciting and happy for us would turn to THIS. I’m afraid I’m the A-hole for asking him to uninvite Matt because he would have to find another best man and it's not my choice to make but it will in fact affect me."

    So she wanted to know: Was she being totally unreasonable?

  • Redditors were quick to let this bride know she wasn't being a bridezilla at all. In fact, a lot of people thought this goes way beyond the big day.

    "Honestly, that line is well past the 'keep him away from your wedding' point," one person wrote. "My SO and I went through a rocky time and a big part of it was his 'friend' that was actively trying to destroy our relationship. When we were getting back together I outright told him I don’t have room for that kind of disrespect in my life anymore and if having this a--hole in his life was so important then I wouldn't be continuing the relationship. It's not controlling behavior if someone is constantly pushing your boundaries. At that point it's just enforcing your boundaries."

  • Though no one was excusing Matt's behavior, some did think there was an "explanation."

    "He's basically saying he intends to use someone else's wedding to get up on a soapbox and talk about lewd and inappropriate topics, like how marriage is bad and the groom should be sleeping with all the bridesmaids instead. I can't decide if Matt is emotionally still 16 years old or if Matt is struggling with the fact that his best friend is happily getting married and he's not. Or maybe Matt is just one of those red pill guys and everyone tolerates him because he's been there forever."

  • Ultimately, though, people thought her groom should totally kick Matt to the curb.

    "The wedding is a celebration of you and your fiancé and your love for one another," one user summed it up. "It is NOT a soapbox for him to spout his anti-marriage position. Furthermore, I understand your fiancé has been friends with him for a while, but if my best friend and prospective best man said something so disrespectful I would’ve kicked his a--. It’s not about what Matt believes in, it's about supporting his friend, your fiancé, and wanting him to be happy. How dare he try to ruin that."