Wife is at Her Wit's End After Pushy MIL Moves in Next Door & Starts Making Demands

Twenty20


Twenty20

Not all of us luck out in the mother-in-law department. (Honestly, if you consider how many times you've heard a friend vent about in-law problems, it's fair to say most of us don't.) But a woman on Reddit is battling some next-level family drama, now that her pushy mother-in-law has moved right next door to her and her husband. In an anonymous post on the online forum, the woman says she's tried to deal as best she can with her demanding MIL, but now, she's at her wit's end -- and "really, really can’t take it."

  • When the poster's MIL decided to move in next door a year ago, she says there was really nothing she could do about it.

    But the longer she's lived there, the worse things have become. 

    "In June, she decides she wants to go up north for a week or so to visit and if we could watch her chickens," the woman explained. "She left in June and came back today. We were stuck watching her chickens for almost five months."

    Her MIL was also ticked that her husband hadn't weeded her yard while she was away -- even though he mowed it the entire time she was gone. 

    "She hasn’t offered any money for the chickens’ food or time spent cleaning their coop and letting them out numerous times a day," the poster continued. "When I told her how much the food was costing us every month, she said, 'Aren’t they such piggies?' [and laughed].”

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  • This isn't the MIL's first offense, either. Apparently, she's no stranger to taking advantage of the couple's generosity. 

    Past violations include walking into the poster's house when the door isn't locked without notice and demanding a 20-page apology letter before allowing her daughter-in-law in her house after one instance where the DIL upset her. She also uses their trash bins so she doesn't have to pay for trash removal herself.

    "This isn’t even the bulk of it," the poster added. "She gave us cockroaches because she had them and kept bringing [expletive] over [to] our house when we told her not to."

    And now, the DIL has had enough.

    "I just want to pack up and go," she wrote. "I love my husband so much, but d--n. I really, really can’t take it."

    In a later edit made to her post, the woman added that her husband apparently saw her Reddit post -- and totally flipped when he read it. 

    "I’m in trouble now with Dear Husband," she wrote. "I showed him this post and I told him I had a question to ask him and he said, 'If you’re going to just be an [(expletive], then I don’t want to hear it.' And he’s been ignoring me since."

  • Most commenters agreed that her MIL was pretty much the worst and not respecting her boundaries.


    "My god. This sounds awful -- I’m so sorry you’re having to deal with this!!" one commenter wrote. "Those dot points just seemed to get worse and worse."

    Another person agreed:

    "You're not overreacting, she's taking advantage of you guys and the fact that you live next door plain and simple. Not only does she now have the expectation that she can disappear on a whim and you'll feed and care for her chickens and maintain her lawn without compensation or reimbursement, but she feels entitled to enter your home whenever and use your trash service without permission. I strongly recommend you guys set boundaries and enforce them ASAP because the longer she feels she can do whatever, the more she'll steamroll you and take advantage."

    Yet another person said it was time to flee the Wicked Witch. 

    "You and DH will get through this," the person wrote. "Move away from that witch of a MIL."

  • Others actually argued that her husband should shoulder a fair amount of blame in this situation.


    "From your edit you have a DH in the fog who isn’t willing to set boundaries," one person wrote. "‘That’s just how she is’ is code for ‘mum's a [expletive] and I don’t want a headache from setting up boundaries and consequences.'" 

    Another person agreed her husband's response to her concerns was alarming. "Also cursing at her was really [expletive] up," the person wrote. "I would demand an apology from him."

    "Either he sits down and listens, or you go, even if just for a bit," someone else advised. "Go to a friend's, to family, anywhere. He is being an [expletive], which there is a subreddit for that too."
  • Later in the thread, the writer clarified it was "very rare" for her husband to call her names.

    "I’m perfectly okay, honestly," the poster shared. "My feelings were a little hurt. We’re not fighting or anything at the moment."

    But she still had no good plans for how to deal with her MIL. 

    "She has this sense of entitlement that everyone should do everything for her," the poster continued. "And if they don’t, she gets very upset. I’m pretty sure she doesn’t hate me and we get along most of the time but she’s so, 'me me me me' that she drives me completely insane."

    It seems like the best thing the writer can do at this point is have an open and honest conversation. First with her husband and then with her MIL. Either way, she needs to be heard.

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