
Twenty20
We're not going to sugarcoat it: Ending any marriage -- even a really bad one -- is just the worst. On a really basic, unemotional level, it's just a huge hassle. Divorce is expensive as all get-out, even if it's amicable, and there's mountains and mountains of paperwork to get through, even if it's a no-fault situation with joint custody and everyone is trying their absolute best to be civil -- and may the Lord help us and the mountains of paperwork if it isn't a super chill divorce. And then, of course, there's all the emotional labor involved. For many people who go through a divorce, it brings up a ton of difficult feelings. Even if we know at our core that we deserve to be happy and that, ultimately, both parents being happy will be better in the long run for our kids, we may end up feeling guilty, feeling like a failure, and feeling hopeless about our romantic future.
Realistically, there are a lot of bad emotions that can come up. And we're often not surrounded by the kind of people who will say the right things in that moment. Sometimes, instead of hearing, "Hey there, person who is wonderful and capable and strong and beautiful, it's going to be OK and this is for the best. Promise," we end up hearing something snippy and belittling from our parents or our former in-laws or our friends. But that doesn't mean this wasn't a good idea in the end. If divorce is something that's been top of mind lately, check out information on when it's time to consider divorce. It's not an encyclopedia of literally everything that could make a divorce happen, but it may help to see if this is a rough patch or something more. And for anyone feeling guilty about how a divorce may impact the kids, know they'll get through it, too. Honestly, there are so many things that are worse for a kid than their parent getting divorced. Finally, for anyone looking for a marker to celebrate their newfound freedom, consider getting a tattoo after that divorce.