What You Should Know Before Buying a 24-Karat Gold Lady Toy for $15K

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As much as I enjoy my sex toys (and I do), is it really necessary to go out and buy bedazzled vibrators -- or gold-plated ones, for that matter? Don't get me wrong, glam is great, but I definitely don't relish the idea of investing oodles of money just to add a little sparkle to my chest of lovely lady toys. If I'm going to dish out the kind of money that could feed a small country, I definitely want my orgasm to be every bit as golden as the damn vibrator that's giving it to me. I say all of this to say, the luxury sex toys recently featured in Gwyneth Paltrow's Goop could certainly break the bank, and I have to wonder ... is the orgasm they offer worth the price tag?

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These are the things you ought to know before dropping $25,000 on the entire package deal, with LELO's 24-Karat Dildo being the highest contender at $15,000. And, we're going to get you the answers you need so you don't have to learn the hard way -- the way that requires you to take out a personal loan or refinance your house.

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We need answers -- like yesterday -- so we spoke with Lorrae Bradbury, sexpert and founder of Slutty Girl Problems, to get to the bottom of the question we're all wondering: Will that gold-plated toy give a gold-plated "O"?

Here's what Bradbury had to say on the matter. While the featured luxury brands are known for their "high-end" products, Bradbury admits, "You can find equally fabulous high-quality toys at a lower cost that are simply not plated in gold but offer the same design and features."

Many lady-toy brands aim to please (seems appropriate to quote Fifty Shades) by giving buyers a quality experience with waterproof material, rechargeable batteries ('til death do you part), and variety -- from speed to power, and so on. So yes, you can totally skip the 24-Karat gold plating and reduce the price of your purchase by thousands -- because the cost, as Bradbury points out, is "related to the luxury and prestige of the material," not the quality of what they have to offer. She also says you can typically get high-quality lady toys for between $100 and $150.

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Bradbury suggests doing your research to prevent making a purchase you'll come to regret (no pun intended) by checking out the reviews before buying:

Instead of reading the reviews on the manufacturer’s or store’s website, visit independent adult toy review blogs. They are usually unbiased, and it’s a great way to get thorough information from a variety of people, experiences, and preferences. Even if a toy is high-quality and from a reputable manufacturer, it might not be exactly what you’re looking for. So, reading reviews in advance can get you familiar with a range of toys and find the perfect fit for your preferences.

For newbies who are still trying to gauge exactly what they like, it may be in your best interest to look into companies with good guarantees on their products. "Lovehoney has a fabulous return policy that allows you to return used toys simply because you don’t like them," says Bradbury.

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Bradbury also warns against making Amazon.com your go-to sex shop: "Sometimes, the toys are knock-offs and are noticeably less quality." Also, she adds, "Often, manufacturers won't honor the warranty of a toy that was purchased on Amazon."

So I think that the overall lesson that we've learned here dates back to the beginning of time, and it's super simple: quality over quantity -- all day, people. There's a price to be paid for a good, quality toy, and while it doesn't have to mean sacrificing this month's rent money, it also won't be something you'll find at the penny candy store either. 

 

Images via iStock.com/g-stockstudio; lelo.com

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