I Tried It: My Husband & I Took the 'Sex Every Day for a Week' Challenge

Cute married couple in sexual foreplay together in their underwear, he is supine and she is sitting on him and playfully looking him in the eye while holding his hand out and pinned to the floor

Before I got married, I was told the best way to keep a husband is with good food on his plate and tons of sex. Seeing as everyone -- on both sides of my family -- is divorced, I figured it might be a good idea to take notes. Now that I'm four years in the marital game and have two kiddos (16 months apart), I can honestly admit that sheet-shaking hasn't been super plentiful. This is why I wanted to take the "sex every day for a week" challenge.

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(Yeah ... about that.)

This challenge certainly made where we had sex very interesting. Seeing as my guy and I both work from home for the time being -- and have our children with us allll day -- the easiest time for us to meet our "sex quota" was when our boys were in their high chairs eating breakfast -- distracted and stuffing their faces. (And, before you try to crucify me, please know they were in clear view while we did it. They couldn't see us, but mama could see them -- so chillax.) Surprisingly, it was easy to have sex during the work week and our hectic schedules. 

Plus, my spontaneity got a HUGE boost. Anyone who truly knows me knows I'm an over-planner who enjoys scheduling my life on a Google Calendar. And yet, there were times when I surprised my guy (even myself) with a impromptu love session. In many ways, I feel like Stella getting her groove back. (There might have been one or two Magic Mike renditions from yours truly.) There's now a little extra pep in my step.

More from The Stir: Love but No Sex: 9 Women on Life in a Sexless Marriage

Of course, between one kid getting up in the middle of the night (our boys share a room), or not going to bed on time, there were a few nights when I looked at the clock, noticed it was 11:45 p.m., and yelled to my husband, "Babe! We've got 15 minutes to get it in -- let's go!" Sometimes we would make the deadline, and other times we were too busy laughing at ourselves running into furniture.

Once we missed a day, I'll admit it, I felt a tad bit defeated. Call it the Virgo in me, but I just don't like failing challenges. 

I started to think about the concept of having sex every day and making a challenge to do so. That's when it hit me: I don't want quantity, I want quality.

Could my husband and I make love more often? Sure, who couldn't benefit from having their back blown out on the regular? (It will save you a trip to the chiropractor.) But I don't want to feel like it's forced -- or that my husband and I are two robots programmed to "insert tab A into slot B," as he says. Failing the challenge was the best thing that could've happened to my marriage because it allowed us to focus more on enjoying each other whenever we can, and not try to force something that wasn't the best time.

Honestly, I don't feel there's some magic sex number you have to hit each week in order to have a happy marriage. (Well, maybe doing it once or not at all isn't good ...) Trying to having sex every day for a week might not have worked for my relationship, but it did reveal more ways to get it in and have fun.

(And, in case you're wondering, the sheets are shaking more often.)

 

 

Image via George Allen Penton/Shutterstock

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