10 Ways to Write a Dating Profile as Cool & Interesting as You

No matter your interests (or your fetishes, if that's your thing), there's a dating app or a dating site just for you. That's awesome! The world is our oyster! But it's also insanely intimidating -- I mean, how are you supposed to sum up your hot, fantastic self in six photos and 150 words?

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We have no idea, so we chatted with Julie Spira, an online dating expert, author of the best-selling The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online, and CEO and founder of CyberDatingExpert.com, to hear her thoughts.

Spira says that in her 20 years of coaching singles on online dating, she's learned that the best way to feel good about your profile is to write one that feels authentic -- not one that's based on what other people are writing, or what you think people will be interested in.

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Here are her tips:

  1. Be honest. "Be genuine, authentic, and tell your real age," Spira says. "Post recent photos, and caption them so the person looking at your photos knows where and when they were taken." This also means being upfront about being a mom, if that's your game: By bringing up your kids right away, you'll help guarantee you're only getting responses from people who are cool with that.

  2. Choose good photos. Love it or hate it, you're being partially judged on the way you look. "Don't post selfies, photos of you wearing sunglasses, or shots from far away," Spira recommends. "Always include a full body shot and an activity shot."

  3. Choose photos you've already shared. Spira also likes to see singles putting photos on dating apps that they've already sharing with their friends on Facebook. "That's a better representation of who you are and who you will be when you show up on a date," she says.

  4. Be specific. Spira emphasizes that this is a dating profile, not your bio on LinkedIn. "Describe your passions, the places you enjoy going to in your spare time, and the wish list of where you'd like to go -- whether it's a specific concert or a travel destination," she says. "This shows your potential date who you are and where he or she could potentially go with you."

  5. Stay positive. "No one wants to date someone who's bitter about their ex, or who rants about financial problems," Spira says. "The happier you appear, the more inviting your profile will be."

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  6. Keep it brief. You don't really need more than 150 words to describe your interests, and Spira says people are more likely to respond positively to profiles that involve less scrolling.

  7. Ask a question. Spria's secret weapon is simple: When you're done talking about yourself, ask a question about them. "By asking the person viewing your profile about themselves, you're inviting a two-way conversation," she explains. "It's the perfect ice breaker."

    If you're not sure what to ask, try an easy "And you?" If you're ready for something more complex, you might prompt them to talk about their favorite foods or travel spots. 

  8. Secure your spot. It's the dating app hack you didn't know you needed: Spira says that by moving the order of your profile photos or slightly changing your description every week, you'll show up in feeds as an updated profile, and you'll be favored in search results.

  9. Proofread. Boring, but important. "Profiles with typos and grammatical errors look lazy and will make the smartest person seem not too smart."

  10. Phone a friend. "When you've finished your profile, show it to a friend and get their reaction," Spira says. The second set of eyes will catch mistakes you might have missed, and your friend's input will help keep you honest and authentic.

Happy swiping, friends!

 

Image via iStock.com/pixdeluxe

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