What Makes a Woman 'Wife Material': Men Reveal the Truth

Wendy Robinson | Sep 3, 2015 Love & Sex
What Makes a Woman 'Wife Material': Men Reveal the Truth

wedding couple

Every year in the United States, over two million couples walk down the aisle, say "I do," and hope for a happily ever after. But before that epic walk into marital bliss, what is it that makes a man decide to, in the immortal words of Beyoncé, put a ring on it? Are men looking for beauty, brains, or the perfect combination of the two? Or do they simply want a woman who is interested in birthing at least four kids as fast a possible? Let's find out! 

Of course, there is no one answer that works for every man out there. Different men, indeed, want different things out of their relationships with future wives. They are complex human beings after all. Of course, that's also what makes this question and their answers -- which ranged from wildly sweet and simple all the way to ridiculously old-fashioned and even caveman-like -- so interesting. 

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We surveyed a group of guys who were willing to spill the beans on the specific values and characteristics that they feel transform a woman from "girlfriend" or even "friend with benefits" material to "wife material."

More from CafeMom: 5 Reasons to Marry a Younger Man

Think you already know what these men will say? Think again. You will be surprised at some of their answers and the fact that, happily, "perfect boobs" was not even one of their responses -- even if, sadly, "nice butt" was! Read on for all their answers. 

  • Big Family



    "I am one of eight kids (yes, I'm Catholic) and I've always wanted a big family of my own. You'd be amazed at how many girls that scared away! I knew my wife was the one when she said she wanted AT LEAST six kids." -- Mark R., Rochester, New York

  • Partner in Crime



    "I wanted a wife who would be a partner in crime. Life is too short to be with someone who can't let loose and have fun. I knew I wanted to propose when she kicked my butt at paintball. My wife takes fun seriously." -- Jeff G., Midland, Michigan

  • Her Score



    "I am careful with my money and I wasn't about to marry a someone with a lot of debt or a bad shopping habit. A score over 720 was required to be wife material in my book." -- Paul A., Edina, Minnesota

  • Brains & Beauty



    "My fiancée is beautiful, but she is also really smart and great at her job. I like that she has ambition and doesn't want to be a stay-at-home mom or depend on me for everything." -- Kurt U., Reno, Nevada

  • Mixed Love



    "As a Black man, I always thought I'd marry a Black woman, until I met my wife. I wasn't sure about it but the more we talked and the more I realized that she understood the possible challenges of being a mixed family, the more convinced I was. Knowing or being willing to learn my cultural background= wife material" -- Arnold H., Coralville, Iowa

  • Nature Girl



    "My biggest hobbies and passions are hiking, trail running, and camping, so I could never settle down with a high-maintenance girl. If your idea of roughing it is staying at a crappy hotel, you are not the one for me!" -- Kyle D., Billings, Montana

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  • Sir Mix-a-Lot Approved



    "I like nice butts and I cannot lie!" -- Grant S., Fort Collins, Colorado

  • Go Team!


    iStock.com/ gpointstudio

    "I'm obsessed with English Premier League soccer. When it is on, I always have my former college soccer team buddies come over and watch. We're loud and we take it seriously. I knew my wife was the one because she's never given me a hard time about my level of obsession and she always welcomes my friends over." -- Duncan K., Saint Paul, Minnesota

  • Mom Material



    "As a single dad, I knew that I wouldn't get married again unless I found someone who would love my girls as her own. When I met Tara, I liked her right away. When I introduced her to my daughters and saw what a natural she was, I was in love. I proposed to make her my wife but also to give my daughters a mom." -- Preston G., Chevy Chase, Maryland

  • Chemistry Counts



    "I wouldn't commit to someone if I didn't think we had sexual chemistry. Sex is important to me and it is a big part of the marriage. I wouldn't propose to someone who wouldn't have sex before marriage. I need the test drive!" -- Chad B., Boise, Idaho

  • Well Groomed



    "I admit it, I am shallow sometimes and I don't think I could have married someone who wasn't willing to make sure her, um, area was neat and trimmed on a regular basis. I like what I like." -- name withheld, by wife's request

  • Keep It Tight



    "I'm a personal trainer, so wife material for me includes someone who is committed to staying in shape. And it isn't just to keep things tight, though that is nice, but also because I lost my mom when she was just 50 to a heart attack. I don't want to lose my wife to a something like that at such a young age." -- Simon C., Hibbing, Minnesota

  • Reader Wanted



    "I once went on a date with someone and she seemed nice but then we went back to her apartment and I swear she didn't have a single book in her whole place. How do you not read? Like, ever? I could never marry someone who doesn't like to read." -- Michael R., Newton, Kansas

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  • Friend to the End



    "I proposed to Aimee when I realized that there was nobody else I'd rather hang out with. She is my best friend, and I can't live without her. For real. She is the best." -- Clark W., Tucson, Arizona

  • Faithful



    "I believe that God should be the center of a marriage. My parents are a big inspiration to me, and they always said 'a marriage takes three: you, her, and Jesus.' I met my now wife at a church singles group, so I think we got it covered!" -- Jason P., Adel, Iowa

  • Puppy Love


    iStock.com/Aldo Murillo

    "If you like cats better than dogs, we are not going to work out. Dogs are obviously the best. I'd never marry a crazy cat lady." -- Derreck N., Portland, Oregon.

  • Homemaker



    "I for sure want kids, and I just don't understand why people have kids and then have them raised by daycare. The fact that Katie wanted to be a stay-at-home mom was really important to me. She is also sweet, smart, and funny. All of that is key." -- Ty L., La Crosse, Wisconsin

    More from The Stir: 11 Things Never to Say to a Stay-at-Home-Mom

  • The Swimmer



    "My wife used to be a competitive swimmer and there was something about watching her swim that is so sexy to me. I knew I'd marry her after watching her first meet." -- Miguel R., Costa Mesa, California

  • Fiery Haired


    iStock.com/Chris Gramly

    "All other things equal, I really hope I find a redhead. I love redheads. But only real ones. No box jobs." -- Tanner N., Tucson, Arizona

    More from The Stir: 10 Intriguing Scientific Facts About Redheads 

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