The Surprising Payoff You Get When Other Women Are Hot for Your Man

woman pulling man to come closer

It's common sense (and science) that we're more likely to orgasm when we're with someone we find attractive. (Duh.) But according to a new study, tapping into another, more surprising emotion may provide an even bigger boost in the bedroom. We'll give you a hint: it's not anger. Or exhaustion. It's not even gratitude-because-he-loaded-and-unloaded-the-dishwasher. (Although, you know, that is pretty hot.)


Nope, what gets us seriously riled up and makes us far more likely to have the Big O is....

When we think other women find our man attractive.

We know, we know, it sounds like high school logic -- ie, where you ignore your lab partner in chemistry class until the captain of the cheerleading squad starts giggling and tossing her hair at his jokes. Suddenly, you're aware of just how cute his Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy t-shirt really is.

Well, same premise, much bigger payoff here.

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We're attracted to a mate who has good genes, or rather, genes that would be a good match with ours. The term for this is "pathogen resistant" -- not exactly sexy. But that's why we all have a different idea of who we find "attractive."

But when researchers at Oakland University in Rochester, MI surveyed over 400 women in committed relationships, they found something interesting: the women who were more likely to have orgasms during sex didn't just find their partner handsome, but they believed other women did, too.

Why does it matter? Evolutionary, my dear Watson. We women are instinctively drawn to mates that we think will give us offspring who are equally attractive to others/successful at mating. (This is the ickily-named "Sexy Sons" hypothesis and no, I'm not making that up.)

So it's not enough that just you find your man a catch. Our libidos really depend on the perceptions of other women, the study's lead researcher explained in an interview with Pacific Standard.

How does this relate to you? We suggest telling other women how your husband loads and unloads the dishwasher -- without being asked. The sideways glances they start to give him will probably ensure you an, um, climactic evening at home.

Do you agree that a little competition can be a turn-on?


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