Men Fall in Love More Than Women -- Really?!

couple walking down street in loveNo matter how big-hearted our fathers, sons, husbands are, we can't seem to shake the battle of the sexes stereotype that it's women who are more in love with love. But according to a recent survey of 2,000 adults, more than half of the men said they've been in love more than once. Meanwhile, just 45 percent of women said the same. Hmm, what is going on here?!


Well, first of all, it bears noting that the survey was done by Häagen-Dazs ice cream and The School of Life, so not exactly the most scientific research. Respondents were also from the U.K., so maybe there's a marked difference between American and Brits?

We set out to confirm or invalidate the survey's findings by asking women between the ages of 18 to 50 how many times they've fallen in love.

Turns out, we got around the same result. About half feel like 28-year-old mom Julie from Virginia who says she's been in love once -- with her husband. "I have been in lust, in like, and infatuated with many that at the time I believed was love," she explains. "Now, I realize what true love is."

The other half say they've been in love more than once -- typically two or three times and most likely with an ex-husband, ex-fiance, and their current spouse.

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But even then, many respondents were quick to describe how their current love is the most serious, and to dismiss their connections with former flames as lustful or obsessive.

"I fall in love very easy," notes Mary S., 32, from Allentown, Pennsylvania. "I have been in that 'deep-in-your-bones, I-can't live-without-him, he is my moon and stars' love with two people in my life, and I was engaged to both of them. Thankfully, I didn't end up marrying them. I am married to my last 'love of my life.' This time was different. It wasn't as 'passionate' as the first two, but it was deeper, and we built our relationship, and our love grew on a foundation of friendship, mutual trust, communication and commitment." 

Some women also believe in different types of love for different phases in their life. As an anonymous respondent put it, "[I expereinced my] first love at 15. Second love as rebellion at 17. Met my husband, fell into forever love, and married at 19."

Whether they've been head over heels once, twice, three times or more, it definitely seems like women may be less willing than men to admit that they've genuinely been in love more than once. Maybe because we want to believe in the fairy tale idea of each person getting only "one true love" per lifetime. And if you admit you've been in love multiple times, what does that say about your current relationship? 

"I've fallen in love once in high school, twice in college, and twice in the decade since," admits Jean S., 32, from Chicago, Illinois. Upon seeing the British survey results, she guessed: "Maybe once people find 'the one' and get hitched, they erase the legitimacy of their previous loves?"

Great question. Maybe there's something to simply calling a spade a spade, and being okay with multiple loves in a lifetime. Who's to say that some, or perhaps even all of them, aren't "true"?

How many times have you been in love?


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