The Importance of Writing Down Your Love

man holding a Valentine's Day card

I’ve paid $6 to park my car for an hour. I’ve paid $6 to get on an airplane faster. I’ve paid $6 for a substandard burrito and I’ve even paid $6 for a bottle of water. As I look around my house, there are very few things still around that I paid $6 for, because while $6 may seem like a lot for some things, $6 will rarely buy you quality or permanence.

I have amassed a collection of Post-It notes from Cody; every once in a while, he’ll paper the house with them while I’m asleep. They don’t say anything particularly profound, but I keep every last one and tuck them away where I can hold them, see his handwriting, and know that for however many minutes he was thinking about me and what I’d be doing in a day to find his little notes.  

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Cody isn’t quite as sentimental, but for the last four years, he has left a Valentine’s card from me hanging on the fridge. Perhaps it’s because he would have felt guilty throwing away a $6 piece of paper or perhaps he agrees it’s the most accurate card in the world. Whatever the reason, the card has stayed on the side of the fridge where we can both see it. Even when things got really hard last Valentine’s, the card stayed. Even as more and more artwork came home from school, the card stayed.

As far as I’m concerned the card isn’t going anywhere and it will be a centerpiece at our 50th wedding anniversary.

He’s spent money on flowers, I’ve spent money on candy, we’ve both spent money on fancy Valentine’s dinners, but none of those things can be hung on the fridge or held in your hand three years later. Suddenly $6 doesn’t seem like so much money, does it?

There is a line at the end of The Fault in Our Stars that reads, “While she was not loved widely, she was loved deeply.” I am loved deeply; I always have been, but I have always fought back against Cody’s love because I never truly felt as though I deserved it.

I thought I was in love when I met him, I thought I was in love on our wedding day, I even thought I was in love when I gave him this card four years ago—and I was in love, but it was always guarded. For the last several months, I have been all in; it’s scary and thrilling and quite possibly the best feeling in the entire world. I know why we made it through last year, and it is because Cody never, ever gave up on me. Not even for a second. He knew that the girl who was so excited to give him a glittery $6 ketchup card was somewhere inside and he fought like hell to get her back.

With text messages and email being commonplace now, it’s rare that we have simple, tangible evidence of sentimentality anymore. If all the computers and phones went away, what words would your loved ones have to literally hold on to? My kids aren’t going to have access to my flirty text messages with their dad in 30 years, but they will someday find a box filled with little love notes, cards, and sticky notes between their mom and dad. Greeting cards and love letters, as archaic and outdated as they may seem, still have a very important part in our history as humans. Don’t let them die out in your own relationship because $6 seems like too much money for a piece of paper at the time.

How will you #PutYourHeartToPaper this Valentine’s Day?

 

Written by Casey Mullins. Casey is a writer, photographer, and nice person living in Indianapolis with two little girls, two cats, and her husband. She loves naps, baked goods, sunshine, and the power of the written word.

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