11 Ways to Get Moms in the Mood for Sex (PHOTOS)

Adriana Velez | Nov 3, 2014 Love & Sex

couple kissingWhen it comes to married sex we seem to have a disconnect. The cliche is that husbands want it more than wives do. But ask any mom and she'll tell you it ain't quite that simple. It isn't that we like sex any less than men do. Trust us on that one! It's that we're just So. Damn. Tired. Always. We're taking care of everyone and everything, and at the end of the day there's just so little of ourselves left, and definitely not the part of ourselves that feels "fun!"

So guys, it's not about getting "lucky" and finding us in the right mood. It's about creating the mood yourself and lining our path to sexy time with rose petals. Guys, here's what you really should do if you want sex tonight.

Which of these would work best to get you in the mood tonight?

 

Image © iStock.com/Mark Bowden

  • Feed Me

    1

    Feed me my favorite food that doesn't make me feel totally bloated and full. You're going to have to ask me what that is -- a day in advance at least so you have time to either shop for the ingredients and make the dish or find out where to order it from. Also, do all the dishes after.

  • Soundproof Our Bedroom Walls

    2

    Egg crates or whatever it takes -- make sure no sound escapes from our bedroom. Oh, and maybe paint the soundproofing stuff the same color as I originally painted the walls. Too much? Okay, fine, just the soundproofing, then.

  • Pick Up Your Socks & Underwear

    3

    Pick up your sock and underwear and put them in the laundry (that wicker basket in the bathroom -- look under your magazines). While you're at it, take all that dirty laundry down to the laundry room. And if you're going there, could you put what's in the washer into the dryer on "heavy duty"? And then, put that dirty laundry you just carried down in the washer and start that -- on medium. Thanks, hon!

  • Make the Whole House Smell Good

    4

    Do something to make the whole house smell good. Maybe it's putting a dozen roses in every single room. Maybe it's baking chocolate chip cookies. Maybe it's lighting some candles. Maybe it's just opening the damn windows so we can get some air in here.

  • Get a Sitter

    5

    Arrange for a babysitter to watch our kids. And by arrange, I mean you find her, call her, agree on a fee, make sure she shows up, give her instructions on putting the kids to bed, including songs she must sing, books she must read, and voices she should use when she reads those books.

  • Actually, Get the Kids Out of the House

    6

    No, you know what would be better? See if you can offload the kids for the night at your parents' house. It's Grandparents' Time.

  • Arrange Flu Shots

    7

    Okay, I know this is coming out of left field, but please take care of this so I'm not obsessing over it during the sex. Find out if the kids' pediatrician office has gotten flu vaccinations yet, and if so, make an appointment for them to come in at the same time. Put it on the calendar. Wait, you have the pediatrician's number, right?

  • Buy That Wine I Like

    8

    Buy that wine I like. You know, the Spanish one we had two weekends ago? Open it, let it air out, and then pour me a glass. Pour yourself a glass, too, obviously. Cheers!

    More from The Stir: 40 Ways to Put Yourself in the Mood for Sex

  • Get Me a Massage

    9

    I'm still really tense. Could you hire a masseur to come in and rub out all the tension in my shoulders and back? He needs to have strong hands and great pecs. And if he could do it shirtless, that would be fantastic. Don't be threatened, though! It's just to get me in the mood, PROMISE.

  • Silence My Phone

    10

    Please silence my phone and hide it somewhere. But also, write down where you hid it so I can find it later. Also? This is a great pre-sex phone-hiding outfit -- just saying. (Rolling up the sleeves is key.)

  • Now, Connect

    11

    Okay, now we're ready! Look deep into my eyes, whisper some sweet nothings, and let's go!

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