My Wife Thinks I'm a Filthy Slob and I Think ... So What?

My wife and I have vastly different definitions for "clean."

I say let the trusty smell test determine when it's necessary for you to shower and wash the jeans you've been wearing all week. (And if you look at the size of my nose, you'll know how capable it is of an accurate smell test.) I also say that if the bowl is yellow, let it mellow (unless company is coming over).

My wife says she married a lazy pig who had better shape up if he wants to stay married. She claims I misrepresented myself during our courtship by showering, changing clothes, and flushing so often.

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Then she'll load dishes into the dishwasher -- after she's worked a full day supporting me -- because she can't stand when a single plate sits in the sink and I can. (Is that my fault?)

Finding your mate using that unwashed pheromone smell is the latest dating rage. But don't try telling that to my wife. And forget all about the "I'm saving the Earth and you're not" argument. She'll only note how people who save the Earth don't turn the thermostat down to 68 in the summer.

Of course, if I have a job interview, lunch with a friend, or a wedding, I'll clean up real nice. But do I ever get a thank you? No. Only a "Why can't you do this for me?"

The things we husbands have to put up with.

Is cleanliness a relationship issue for you?


Image via Corey Levitan

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