12 Really Good Reasons to Say No to Being a Bridesmaid

bridesmaidsThis upcoming June, I will be in my sixth wedding. Always a bridesmaid, never a ... you get the picture. And of course it's lovely when your close friends or family members get married and you get to stand up there with them while they make those incredibly important vows and you get to share in all their love and commitment and blah blah blah, but sometimes, it truly sucks to be a bridesmaid.

From the expense to the time off to having to attend all those events to paying for the dress, it seems that the duties of a bridesmaid are becoming more and more taxing every year. Whenever a friend or family member gets married, and you know you're going to get asked to be a bridesmaid, no one can blame you if a fleeting NO crosses your mind, especially since you know everything that goes into becoming one. We asked a few women why they would say no to being a bridesmaid, and here are 12 reasons why.


1. "Because I don't have an extra $400 laying around to spend on their heinous bridesmaid dresses ..."

2. "Mainly, the time and money! We JUST planned an elaborate shower; then we had a super pricey multi-day bachelorette party; and then there's the rehearsal dinner and wedding. I feel like every other weekend there's something for this wedding, and I'm shelling out more cash. That said, I am very happy and excited for her."

3. "From the wedding photog perspective, I always feel bad for the bridesmaids who are forced to wear a dress that totally does NOT fit their body type just so it matches."

4. "What's up with these weekend-long, far away, expensive trips for bachelorette parties? My friend is having her bachelorette party in New Orleans this year. Can't we just go to our local sketchy male strip club or something for the night, yeesh."

5. "Traveling for the bridal shower, the bachelorette party, and the actual wedding itself is taking out a huge chunk of change from my budget this year. I am not a rich person."

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6. "Not only do you have to pay for a dress you're never going to wear again (YOU'RE REALLY NEVER GOING TO WEAR IT AGAIN), you have to factor in the costs for alterations, shoes, and if the bride wants you to get your hair and makeup done professionally. It's insane."

7. "The bride whose wedding I'm in is disallowing her bridesmaids to be pregnant for the main event."

8. "I'm terrible at and petrified of small-talk, and bridal showers are pretty much my nightmare incarnate. Ooohing and ahhing over kitchen supplies and then making me write everything down for thank-yous later as a bridesmaid is one of the worst ways I can think of to spend my Sunday afternoon."

9. "ALL THE GIFTS. Showers, bachelorette parties, the gift for the wedding itself, isn't my presence and you forcing me to buy a dress and shoes enough of a hit on my wallet?"

10. "I know I need to be happy for my friend whose wedding I'm in, but (this is anonymous, right?) I'm also quite jealous. We are the exact same age and she's getting married and I'm still super-single. Of course I want to be happy for her, and of course I am, but being a bridesmaid always helps to remind me how very single I am."

11. "The bride is marrying my ex-boyfriend."

12. "Posing for all the pictures instead of drinking at the open bar. Having to dance into the reception like a jackass. Worrying you're going to trip while walking down the aisle. Hating the dress the bride picked but being unable to say anything. Taking days off of work because you have to attend all the events. Oh, you asked for one reason, didn't you?"

What was your biggest gripe when you were a bridesmaid?


Image via Tony Atler/Flickr

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