12 Ways to Spice Up Your Sex Life Without Really Trying

Ahh, sex. Nothing better, right? Well, sure, when you're young, carefree, love your body, haven't become horribly irritated with your spouse yet, didn't have kids, didn't have a house ... oh, wait, what was I saying? Yes, yes, we love sex! Of course we do. Sex is an important component to a relationship ... and, yet, let's face it, add in heaping helpings of a stressful life and suddenly it's the last thing on your mind. Yet we all want it for intimacy, for bonding, for the orgasm. (If we're lucky.) But who has time to read sex books, master new positions, or go on a romantic vacation? People without jobs and kids, that's who. So what do you do if that's not you?

So here's 12 ways to spice up your sex life ... without really trying (that hard).


Heat up there. Put a cinnamon mint in your mouth before going downtown. This can work for both parties. If you refuse to go downtown, then you're going to need more help than you'll get in this post.

Heat up down there. Use a personal lubricant that has a touch of spicy warmth to it. Many brands have a warming gel.

Flirtation. Remember the days when your husband you would get terribly jealous if your husband even looked at another woman? Face it, the sex was hot after one of those ridiculous jealousy fights. Agree to go to a bar and allow each spouse to flirt with whomever he or she wants for 15 minutes. No, you can't get a phone number.

Strip bar. Go to a strip bar together. This might seem like one for hubs, but it's really for both of you, because hubby is going to want to hump like an unfixed dog but he can only go home and do it with you.

Use your imagination. Try pretending your husband is Jon Hamm or your celeb (or even your neighbor or delivery man) of choice. Try pretending you are someone else. You don't have to say anything about this. In fact, that's preferable. It's your secret. Just don't call out "Jon!" in the heat of passion.

Tell and touch. Agree that each partner has to listen to exactly what you want and then do it while you're doing it. No judgments. No whining. This doesn't mean do something you find painful or distasteful, but it means listening to what makes your partner feel good, really listening, and learning. Unfortunately too many couples are too embarrassed to ask or tell and years into a relationship can still be (wrongly) guessing!

Do the dishes (or at least something). Seriously, guys, if you want to get a gal in the mood, take one of her "to do" tasks off her list. Women find it hard to have sex when she's thinking about the dirty pans. One of those silly studies showed that men who did more "traditional" chores like car fixing and paying bills apparently have more sex, but no one even asked if this was good sex or why they were having more sex (maybe the macho car fixing dude just insists on it). I'm telling you, take something off your woman's chore list tonight, see how it goes.

Watch the kids. Ever wonder why your wife is so tired all the time and has no interest in sex? Make an offer to fully babysit for a night. Watch her libido skyrocket.

Take a bath together. You've got to get cleaned up anyway.

Give a little love tap/slap. Try LIGHTLY and playfully slapping your man on the face. Don't warn him you're going to do it. Do it with a smile.  And then walk into the bedroom. If you know your man won't appreciate that, then slap his butt. The point is to be a little dominant.

Compliment your guy's junk. When's the last time you've done that? Guy's are so proud and yet so insecure about their manhoods. Tell him how you love his.

Compliment your woman's ass. Same thing, fellas.

What do you do to spice up your sex life?


Image via Danielito311/Flickr

Read More >