How to Find Your Soulmate in 13 Romantic Steps

Soulmates are everywhere. Or at least, so we're led to believe. We see and hear about them all the time in movies and on TV. Two people meet and know -- somehow they always just know -- it's FOREVER. These scenes are usually filmed in slow motion, perhaps with a montage thrown in (I'm a SUCKER for a good montage!), and you sit back and wonder how they got to be so lucky.

Or, at the very least, I do.

Here are some ways to find your soulmate. Part of it is just believing!


1) Be honest about what a "soulmate" means to you. I'd suggest making an actual list -- not a mental one -- of the traits that you want to see in a life partner.

2) Remind yourself that no matter how lonely you may feel, there IS someone out there for you. Open yourself up to feel the love of others -- friends, children, the Universe -- and allow yourself to believe you ARE worthy of love. Because you are. We ALL are.

3) See if there are facets of your life that may be preventing you from finding your soulmate. Perhaps it's little behaviors, things you're holding on to in your heart. Perhaps your life needs a little cleaning out. Then you can seek a great relationship by opening those doors and allowing love to find you.

4) Take a hard look at your past relationships and see what went wrong. Were there ways you acted that weren't becoming? Were you demanding or greedy? Could you accept another into your life? Figure out what your relationship issues have been and begin to work through them to help adjust your behavior.

5) Work through old hurts. If you had previous relationships you're still not over, you're not ready to move forward. Find a therapist or a good friend to talk to and work on healing your old love wounds.

6) Grieve the ones who weren't The One and allow yourself the time and space to fully feel those losses before attempting to move forward in your love life. You'll know it when you see your soulmate.

7) Remember all that you've gone through has brought you to this moment -- this exact moment. Be grateful for all you've learned, for without that knowledge, you won't be able to move forward. Allow yourself to release your former loves with a fond, loving farewell.

8) As you work on cleaning up your emotional life and letting go of past loves, get rid of the physical belongings that remind you of your lost loves and heartbreaks.

9) Believe that you'll know it when you meet your soulmate. There will be an emotional and spiritual connection between you -- which is why those who have found their other halves are able to say, "I just knew." You will too.

10) Enjoy being single until you find The One. Enjoy your life. Don't live in "should"s and "wants" -- this is your life. Nurture your heart and mind with the love of friends.

11) Want to find a soulmate. Most of us shy away from this because it feels weird, or we're cynical, but it's very powerful to allow the want of a true love to fill us up.

12) Allow yourself -- and meditate about -- the fantasy of your soulmate. Daydream yourself into that relationship. It can help identify what you want in a mate.

13) Open your arms to love. We have to grow to become the right version of ourselves to find that missing piece, our soulmate. That means being brave and opening up our hearts and souls, which take us on a long and winding journey toward hope, healing, and, eventually, our true, forever love.

Any other suggestions for finding a soul mate?

Image via CarbonNYC/Flickr

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