10 Things You Need to Know About Having a 'Friend With Benefits'

You've heard it a million times: having a "friend with benefits" can be setting you up for betrayal and heartache. It's true. If feelings get involved, it can be nearly impossible to separate the sexin' from the lovin'. And that's no good.

But having a friend with benefits has enough upsides that it's worth a thought. Just please practice safe sex.

So here's a primer for making friends with benefits work for YOU.


1) Make it clear that both of you understand what you have is awesome, but it is nothing more than two friends having sex.

2) Always, always, ALWAYS practice safe sex. By that I mean, make him put a condom on. Because the last thing you want is a case of crotch cooties when you're just having fun.

3) Continue to keep the lines of communication open. That way, if one of you develops real feelings for the other, it can be discussed in an open and frank manner.

4) Having a friend with benefits means that you can really let loose and learn what you love about sex. Just because you once had a great boyfriend doesn't mean he was a fabulous lover.

5) It's liberating to have some fun romping around in the sack without strings attached.

6) You can explore your sexuality in a way that won't make someone you care about get all squeamish about it.

7) Did I mention no obligations? Obligation-free sex has to be some of the best sex out there.

8) Having a friend with benefits can be great fun. And we can all use a little more fun in our lives.

9) Without the emotions attached to sex in a committed relationship, you're entirely free to focus on the more carnal pleasures.

10) It allows you - yes, YOU - to learn about yourself emotionally. Maybe being friends with benefits isn't something you can do. Maybe you can't take having sex with someone you're not in love with. That's fair. It's also valuable to know the things you can and cannot do.

What are some other pros and cons for having friends with benefits?

Image via he(art)geek/Flickr

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