So, Your Parents Hate Your Boyfriend: Should You Give a Darn?

You're torn in two -- you have your partner, who you love madly, and you have your parents, who raised you. The problem? Your parents cannot stand your partner. Like, at all.

What do you do when your parents hate your partner (besides eat a lot of ice cream and cry at Hallmark commercials)?

Here's some advice.


First things first: Your parents probably have your best interests in mind. They raised you, after all, and if they did a bang-up job, you're probably still close to them. So if they're getting their hackles raised by your current partner, you need to figure out what's going on.

Ask your parents what their problem is with your partner. Unless they're the type that cannot stand the thought of their precious baby dating ANYONE, they probably have a pretty good reason. They've been around a lot longer than you, so it's important to hear them out. Press for specifics, rather than, "I don't like him/her."

Once you find out the reasons, take a step back from the situation completely. Take your space, talk to your friends, and see if what your parents are saying is true. Is he really slimy? Is he really a player? Your friends may have been masking the truth -- that he's kinda an asshole -- to spare your feelings. So tell them to give it to you straight.

Then, take a big step back and examine your partner, knowing what it is specifically your parents dislike about him or her. Is it true? Is he being weirdly secretive about other girls? Is he really treating you badly? Is he abusive?

If your friends hate him or her and you can kinda see where he's (or she's) an ass, then it's time to move on. There are bigger, better fish in the sea, and you deserve the very best out of any relationship.

However, if your friends don't think that there's a problem with your partner -- even after you've asked them to give it to you straight up and dirty (mentioning your parents' specific issues), and you cannot see what it is that your parents dislike, it's time to make a choice.

You're an adult. It's up to you who you date. If you think your parents are wrong, go back to them and tell them so. Give them examples of why they are wrong. Tell them that you appreciate that they're looking out for you, but that you are perfectly happy in your relationship.

And then? Be happy that you made an informed decision.

What other advice can you give to someone whose parents hate his or her partner?


Image via ingrida danieliute/Flickr

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