Jon Hamm-o-Grams Are Like Cheeky Candy Grams for Grown Ups

hamm o gramGod, remember those awful Valentine's Days in middle school where you could send and receive candy grams? And how the more you received was somehow a reflection of your worth as a human being in the tyrannical feudal system that was the seventh grade? I feel anxious and pimply just thinking about it. But now that those days are behind us, it's time to put on a brave face and confront the red and pink holiday full on. And truly, there's no better way to do so than with a little Jon Hamm, a.k.a. Don Draper, a.k.a. Dick Whitman, a.k.a. One Sexy Beast.

Introducing Hamm-O-Grams. Send your friend one of these old-fashioned cards (they arrive in this thing called the mail!) featuring everyone's favorite 1960s misogynist on TV. It's sure to make her smile a smile that would warm even the cold, cold heart of that bitchy Betty Francis.

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At $5 a pop, they're not cheap, but rest assured that some of this money you're spending on a Jon Hamm card is going to charity. So what exactly are you getting?

According to the website, you're purchasing an individually crafted letter with a photo of Jon Hamm "saying" your sexy love note. You know, a hot Hamm with a thought-bubble that reads whatever you want it to say. Depends on what you're in the mood for, but I'd choose something like, I don't know: "You're so hot and awesome that if you played my wife on TV, I'd only cheat on you like once a month." Or, "God you're gorgeous. Should we bone on my couch, then smoke some cigarettes?" Perhaps, "Why don't you take off your top, pour us some bourbon, and let's talk about what happens in season five." Or maybe something like: "I hope you're hungry because all this Hamm isn't going to eat itself."

Best part is, it's up to you. Whatever you want the glorious Jon Hamm to say to your friend, you got it. Just go to their site and create your own Hamm-o-Gram, keeping in mind it takes three to five days to arrive. I personally can't wait to send a few now that I have my Jon-Hamm-quote-box wheels turning. Sorry in advance, friends! You're about to get Hammed.

What do you think of the Hamm-o-Grams? What would you want yours to say?

 

Photo via hammogram.com

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