Not Clare nor her buddies. They wish!There's a 100-year-old woman in England who is awesome. When it came time for Clare Ormiston to go from the double-digit to the triple-digit age bracket, she wanted to do it in style. Sexy style. Forget the congratulatory letter from the Queen and the boring old string quartet, Clare wanted to experience something brand new. When her daughter informed her that she couldn't get her a seat on the moon, Clare said her second choice then was to have a stripper perform.
Like I've always said, there's nothin' like some swinging penises to ring in life as a centenarian.
So Scorpion was called up and he headed to the Glenfield Residential Home to give Clare and her old-timer buddies the show of their lives. Bow chicka wow wow, bow chicka wow wow indeed. Clare said she had a ball (tee hee). When asked how she felt about seeing Scorpion pant-less in front of her, she said, "I enjoyed that. It definitely put a smile on my face."
What a cheeky old girl. I wonder if her two great grandchildren were on hand to enjoy the party. Something tells me they would've been the age of Scorpion's regular customers.
Good for Clare and her retirement village and her family for being so damn funny. I bet she's been to hundreds of birthday parties in her life, and now on her day, when she turned the big 1-0-0, she finally got what she's been waiting for for years: A nasty too-tan wanna-be dancer stark naked in her living room. It was a birthday miracle!
I can't wait to see what Clare plans for her 101st partay. Maybe a little trip to Vegas? There's a sex museum in New York she might enjoy. Then again, there's always Scorpion. There's always Scorpion.
Has your grandmother pulled a crazy stunt like this?
Photo via k4dordy/Flickr