Even Jamie Oliver's Wife Thinks Her Husband Works Too Much

jamie oliverAh, the age-old married-with-children gripe: One spouse feels overworked and underappreciated, and the other spouse feels ... overworked and underappreciated. Perfect example: Recent remarks made by Food Revolution star Jamie Oliver, who clearly feels that he works and he slaves and he works and he slaves and for what? Jools, wife and "mum" to the Olivers' four children, certainly doesn't "get it."

No really, that's what he said.

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"We're sort of caught in a bit of a rut," says the chef. "She doesn't necessarily get every project that I do."

"I take sufficient weekends and holidays a year for any British woman, but that doesn't mean I get thanked," he continues.

"I get asked to take more."

Whoa there, Jamie, maybe you should be taking this up with your marriage counselor! But I get where he's coming from, and I REALLY get where Jools is coming from. At least Jamie's hard work is recognized and rewarded by the world at large. Jools, on the other hand, is working her bum off chasing after four kids every day (I've got to assume the woman can afford help, but still) and there are no magazine covers or cheering TV studio audiences applauding her efforts at the end of a long day.

This is a common characteristic of the SAHM/career-focused dad dynamic, but I honestly think some level of this struggle exists for parents of every situation, whether one parent or two parents or no parents stay at home.

It all comes down to the vicious cycle of validation: I don't feel like you're validating my efforts, so I'm not going to validate your efforts, so you don't feel like I'm validating your efforts, so you're not going to validate my efforts ... or something like that.

One of those frustratingly simple solutions that's sooo hard to reach.

Anyway, I'm sure Jools and Jamie will be just fine -- I recommend a kid-free, week-long vacation. Of course not every couple can manage that remedy, but maybe a "Hey. You done good today" would get the ball rolling in the right direction.

Do you feel like your efforts are validated by your spouse?

 

Image via really short/Flickr

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