'Shocking' Kinky City List Really Doesn't Matter

kinky license plateI'm skeptical of lists of kinkiest cities mostly because there is kink to be found anywhere, even where you live right now. Can kink be found in the cities that made the list -- Las Vegas, New York, Chicago, San Francisco, Southern New Mexico, Southern West Virginia, Atlanta, Austin, New Orleans, Roselawn, Indiana, and Hurley, Wisconsin? Oh yes. But it's everywhere else, too.

When I worked at Babeland in NYC, I sold a lot of sex toys to a lot of strangers. No matter how near or far they lived, when they opened the frosted glass doors, each and every one of them entered an alternate universe. Even the native New Yorkers were transported out of their comfortable routine. For a lot of people, the sex shop was a kinky destination. 

Just like home is in your heart, a kinky sexy vacation spot can be anywhere in your home, or at least your hometown.


Get a room. Take a lunch break, day off, or night out and have afternoon sex in a local hotel. Do it while the kids are at camp, or school, or with a babysitter. Take a few hours, not a few days, to bring sexy back. 

Take a class. In most major cities there are tantra workshops, basic sex classes, and one-on-one coaches who are willing to teach you and your partner how to explore a deeper love. In NYC, Chicago, and LA, you can even take classes for free

Go online, but don't sneak around to do this; do it with your partner. Fetlife is the Facebook for the kinky crowd, and you're likely to find someone within miles of where you live who is interested in exploring, or knows a good place for some out-of-the-ordinary sexy good times. If you can't visit a sex shop in your neck of the woods, browse or shop online together, and talk about some sexy accoutrements you'd be willing to try. 

Get a couple's massage. Candles! Strangers! Relaxing music! Not only is the environment erotic, but it's sexy to watch your partner receiving pleasure, and equally as sexy to be watched. And when you're finished with the massages, maybe you'll get lucky and be left alone for enough time for a double happy ending.

Visit a Gentleman's Club. You don't have to be a gentleman to visit a strip club. I've been to my fair share of them and I can honestly say that it rocks to be the girl in the club. Female strippers tend to gravitate to other females, or at least the friendly ones do, and they are usually eager to make sure you have a great time. Plus, it's fantastic fantasy fodder when your husband or boyfriend watches another lady all up in your lap. 

Where would you visit to kink up your sex life?

Image via scottfeldstein/Flickr

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