Funny Valentine's Poems to Make You LOL

valentines day candyAre you writing a Valentine's poem? Know someone who is and needs to get beyond "and violets are blue"? With February 14 right around the corner, Cupid, the love muse, may be a bit busy.

My almost-4-year-old loves to find rhyming words, we play "rhyme that word" all of the time ... and I can't seem to stop doing it even here at the office, much to the annoyance of my cubicle mate. Dontcha love it when home life and the work world unite? Makes me all sorts of gushy and warm inside.

Lucky you! I've gathered some popular words you may need to rhyme in your love poem and came up with some winning stanzas for all relationship types.

Consider it my early Valentine's Day gift!



Symbol of love and unofficial logo of Valentine's Day. But, actually, a tad tough to match up in a poem. Here are a few:

When you are wooing on a budget: I'd like to win your heart, how about a date at that street cart?

For that girl you're dating, the one who's straight out of a horror flick: Oh, be still my heart, please don't stop it with a lawn dart.

When you've been together a long time and anything goes: I will always have my heart, because you don't care that I fart.

For that short-term relationship: Today you may have my heart, but I'll need it back when we part.


Love! What this day honoring St. Valentine is all about. Young love, new love, old love, puppy love, unrequited love. All different kinds of love, but what to rhyme with it? 

When you need to send your possessive chicakdee a message: You may have all of my love, but don't keep me caged like a dove.

For the couple in their "golden years" or those with a newborn and are a tad sleep-deprived: Remember the old days, love, when I could find my left glove?

For you jealous types: I am so glad you are my love, but when I see your ex, he, I will shove.


Well, yeah, duh. It is the name of  the holiday. But what rhymes with it? Sure, the ubiquitous "Valentine, be mine!" or the oft-used "For you, Valentine, my heart will always pine." But you can do better than that. Try one of these gems:

If she loves backhanded compliments, this is a good one: My sweet Valentine, I love you even when you whine.

In case you are uncertain just how your ode of love may be interpreted: You are hotter than your sister, Valentine! Gee, did that cross the line? 

Who doesn't love a good double entendre: I really love the way you brine, you can soak my fish any day, Valentine!

Can you come up with any good ones?

Image via Rainbow Photos!/Flickr

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