Was Your Husband Your First?

Number 1What do you call a woman who has slept with only one person, her husband, in her entire life?

Incredibly blessed? Or tragically unfortunate?

I know a handful of women like this. And no, I don't live in the Bible Belt, though some of these women had strict religious upbringings and saved themselves for marriage. Others I know married their childhood sweethearts.

I wasn't raised religious and I didn't have a childhood sweetheart. I had pre-marital sex. With the man who became my first husband, with a few men before him, a few after him and last but not least, with the man who is my second husband.


And even though I got a late start, at the age of 20, I sure made up for it. Along the way, I've slept with what I think is a reasonable number of men. More than ten, less than twenty.

I think only one of those was a one night stand. A blind date who picked me up in his red Porsche early one morning to go river rafting. We ended up fooling around in the river and spending the night in a run-down motel that looked like it was out of the movie Psycho. Of course alcohol was involved and the guy never called me again. Which is okay. I don't remember his name, I had a lot of fun and it's a great story. (And yes, he did wear condoms.)

But there is something romantic about having only one partner your entire life. True love, soul mates and all of that good fairy tale stuff. The oneness of the sexual relationship makes this type of marriage unique. A couple of the differences which, depending on your viewpoint, are either good or bad:

  • You'll never know if your man has a big penis. Or a small one.
  • If you get a sexually transmitted disease, you'll know who it came from.
  • You won't know if your husband is good in bed. Or bad.
  • You can't brag about past sexual exploits to your girlfriends. You won't have any.
  • You and your husband can do all of your sexual exploring together. He won't have to worry whether or not you learned that move from Johnny back in college.

I'll never be able to claim any of those but I don't regret my sexual experiences. I had to screw a few frogs before I found the love of my life.  And everything that happened along the way? That's just life. My husband knows that he's the only one that matters.

Are you married to the first man you had sex with?


Image via Mrs Logic/Flickr

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