'Real Housewives of New Jersey' Edition: 5 Things About My Love Life

real housewives of new jerseyHaving watched this week's episode of the RHO New Jersey about 20 times, I feel I've learned some things about all of the ladies' love lives that are pretty relevant to their current conundrums.

All the housewives have their own style, their own sex appeal and they are not afraid to show it. Especially Danielle. But I really didn't need to point that out, did I?

From the most tumultuous season yet, here are the five things I've learned about the New Jersey Housewives sex lives so far:


Teresa: I don't care if you kick me out of my $5 million home, Joe loves outdoor sex.

Jacqueline: I just want to keep on having more babies. You know, to make up for everything I did wrong with the first one.

Danielle: All of my dates must pass a strict physical. If you can't carry me to a car while I'm having a complete emotional melt down when someone looks at me wrong, or tries to stab me, then we can't be together.

Ashley: I'm not sure what happened to my much more mature, cute, and possibly sane boyfriend. Do you think I should go after him, weave-style and talk about it on Facebook? Yeah, that'll impress everyone him.

Caroline: I'm way too normal to publicly talk about my sex life.


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