OMG, y'all. You'll never guess what kids at a Mississippi school had to see this week! A sixth grader waltzed into school wearing a t-shirt that showed off the United States Marine Corps' bulldog's butt right down to his (barely there) dangling doggy genitalia.

Thank goodness the school administrators came a-running to protect those wee ones and their eyes. They told 13-year-old Jordan Griffith he needed to take the shirt his big brother gave him and turn it inside out. Because we can't just have little kids seeing something they can see in nature on a kid's t-shirt, can we?

Oh ... wait.

Fleet Week begins today! This is the week when the U.S. Navy, Marines, and Coast Guard take a break from active duty, dock in New York City, and enjoy ceremonies and some R & R. In fact, there's a parade of ships floating up the Hudson as I write this. Throughout the weekend there will be exciting flight demonstrations and guided tours of ships.

It's a privilege to host our men and women in uniform this week. They deserve a fun week on the town after serving for weeks and months aboard those ships. (There are other, smaller Fleet Weeks in other U.S. cities.) The Navy is live-streaming events -- so no matter where you are you can join in, too. In honor of our troops, we put together a little slideshow. Hello, Sailors!

Taylor Swift might just be as sweet as she looks. The country pop singer has always loved her fans, so much so that she's still surprised that the audience likes her, but this story goes to show just how genuinely grateful she is for her admirers and for the troops.

Corporal Josh Marreel uploaded a video to get Taylor's attention, but he didn't want concert tickets or for her to be his date at a dance. Instead, his motivations were entirely selfless -- he wanted Taylor to know that 22-year-old Sergeant Wade Wilson, a Marine killed in action in Afghanistan, was a huge fan of hers. Wade had a poster of Taylor in his bunk and really loved her music.

Taylor got the message, saw the video, and decided she wanted to honor Sgt. Wilson in a big way.

Word has it Teen Mom Amber Portwood is already on to another harebrained scheme. A week ago, she was hauled off to jail on a probation violation, only to be released from the big house on Thursday. And now brother Shawn Portwood says the trouble reality star is planning to "join the military."

Don't let it be said that those teen moms don't make plans quickly. But that doesn't mean the plans are wise. Anyone else thinking a stint in the armed forces would last about as long for Portwood as her latest jail term?

Hold it right there Americans! I know you're all excited to get to the end of the month for the three-day holiday weekend that officially starts off the summer. But I think you're forgetting something. Armed Forces Day? It's May 19 this year. That's a week BEFORE Memorial Day.

If you haven't heard of it, I'm more sad than shocked. Armed Forces Day is the one holiday that celebrates all the members currently serving in our military. While Memorial Day is about our fallen and Veterans Day about our retired military, this is a day when we honor the men and women who are working for our country every day.

And I have just the thing to get you in the right mindset to pay tribute.

Is there anything better than a warm, early summer night spent at a minor league baseball game? There is if you ask the Guzman family. Captain Angel Guzman, who was serving in the Army Reserve in Afghanistan, surprised his three children at a RiverDogs game in Charleston, South Carolina last week. His kids, ages 7, 5, and 18 months, weren't expecting him home until the end of the month and therefore got the startle of a lifetime.

The kids threw out the first pitch at the game, and when the catcher took off his mask, they saw DAD for the first time in over a year.

Get ready to get angry. Incredible Hulk kind of angry. A cargo worker at JFK Airport in New York is facing charges this week for allegedly stealing from care packages that he was supposed to be getting onto planes, care packages that were packed up for members of our military serving overseas.

Cops say the suspect in the thefts, Terrance Ralph, was caught because he had the audacity to actually wear some of the pilfered items to work. No surprise, really. If he really is the kind of guy who would steal from a care package, he can't be terribly bright, can he? At least I hope this alleged crime was simple stupidity, because the other alternative is even more depressing.

Every Monday morning, my Facebook feed fills up with people moaning that it's just not fair that weekends are so short. I'll tell you what's not fair. A veteran of the US Marines reportedly pulled a friend from the fiery wreckage of a plane crash in Kansas this weekend. And then he died.

Austin Anderson survived two tours of duty in Iraq. He was already a hero in my book. And now, at 27, he's gone.