POSTS WITH TAG: language

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    Kids. It's a good thing we love them so much because, man, can they be assholes.

    This is a picture my son drew of me last year. Not just any picture ... it was supposed to be a realistic portrait. A glimpse of how he saw me.

    I'm not sure I've completely recovered yet. 

    Between that, the way my daughter questions my clothing choices, the pointing out of every line on my face ... it's a wonder I have the confidence to leave the house. 

    I asked my friends to share some feedback their kids gave them, and it turns out I'm not alone. Here are some of their most recent insults ...

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    Plenty of parents let their toddlers watch a little TV here and there, but they're always careful to make sure they are viewing shows that are appropriate for their age level. What harm can a cute cartoon do?

    Well, one mom in the U.K. is outraged after she says her 2-year-old learned the "F" word by watching Peppa Pig.

    Natalie Cox couldn't believe her ears when her daughter, Kiannah, blurted out the words "f***ing gazelles" after watching the "Madame Gazelle's Leaving Party" episode from her Peppa Pig DVD collection.

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    They may be a bit of a challenge to take care of and all, but have you ever taken a step back and thought about just how amazing your toddler really is?

    And I don't mean the fact that you created him and he's the spitting image of you or anything like that. I'm talking about the whole philosophy on life toddlers have -- which is so simple and pure, it's kind of a shame that kids have to lose it once they grow up.

    As crazy as it may sound, our lives would probably be much easier as adults if we all acted like little kids once in a while.

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    OMG. Have you ever been out in public with your toddler when all of a sudden something so outrageous comes out of his mouth that you don't know whether to die of embarrassment or roll on the floor with laughter in the hopes others will join in?

    I think it's pretty safe to say we've all been there. They may be sweet and innocent (most of the time), but little kids definitely don't understand the concept of thinking before they speak or act -- especially around people they don't know.

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    If we were allowed to pull a child out of his home every time we disagreed with the way he was being raised, it's frightening to think how many parents would be without their children. But, assuming neither physical nor severe emotional abuse is involved, there's a line we and authorities don't get to cross when it pertains to other people's children. Police in Nebraska went too far this week when they placed a toddler in child protective services after viewing a disturbing video posted on Facebook in which the tot traded obscene comments and gestures with adults in the room. 

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    What did you do on New Year's Eve -- do you remember? Maybe you don't because you fell asleep on the sofa before the ball even dropped. Or maybe you don't remember because New Year's Eve is kind of the Las Vegas of holidays. What happens on New Year's stays in New Year's. Know what I mean? I think this is a holiday best left untelevised, which is why I'm cringing for these two drunk women celebrating New Year's Eve with a very liberal (ahem, FOX News) dose of profanity, as one does. Hey, hey laaaydies, whatcha gonna do tonight?

    Dear readers, you may want to put on headphones before watching this video. NSFW and all that.

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    When a sign language interpreter hired to work onstage during Nelson Mandela's memorial service was revealed to be signing nonsense, the world was up in arms. And fair enough! It was incredibly disrespectful to that great leader to have someone pretending to know sign language on stage 'translating' the words of Mandela's grandchildren and leaders from around the world including President Obama.

    What made the incident even more shocking? Once his skills (or lack thereof) had been confirmed, it was soon discovered that this wasn't the first time he had been hired to work in such a major capacity. But now reports are coming in that indicate this might be more than a simple instance of fakery. It turns out there's something much more troubling afoot.

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    Have you ever glanced over at your toddler and found he has this really strange look on his face -- and stopped and wondered what in the heck he's thinking?!?

    Even though they don't always come right out and say what's on their mind, you know their little brains are working overtime in their heads pondering all sorts of interesting things. And let's be honest -- half the time they're probably trying to come up with some sort of scheme to get what they want out of us (while being so irresistibly cute we can't possibly refuse).

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    Toddlers. They say the rudest things sometimes, don't they? Well, I guess technically toddlerisms can't be considered rude since little ones are working with a very small vocabulary (and they're not yet familiar with this whole "etiquette" thing). But could you imagine if grown adults said some of the things toddlers say?! You'd want to punch those people in the face! Unfriend them! Have them arrested!

    Here are 12 real-life things toddlers have said that NO ONE else on this earth could get away with.

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  • Rant

    8 Ways I'm 'Ruining' My Child's Life

    posted by Lisa Fogarty November 4, 2013 at 5:38 PM in Toddler
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    I consider myself an okay mom. What I lack in attention to detail, I make up for with lots of patience. My two-and-a-half-year-old isn't potty trained yet, but she speaks in complete sentences. We read lots of books together, take walks to the park, chat over dinner, and I'd say overall my daughter appears to be happy enough with my mommy performance thus far. 

    But there's at least one person in this world who is convinced I've got this motherhood thing all wrong: my dear, amazing but judgmental, 92-year-old grandmother. Here are the top 8 ways I'm "ruining" my child -- and possibly my unborn child as well -- according to granny. 

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