The State of the Union Address 2013 was on tonight, but if you missed it, have no fear -- I’m here to recap it for you. It can be hard to keep everything the president says straight, especially when he says things that directly contradict with other things he’s said or done in the past. So just for fun, let’s take some of his best lines of the night and match them up against his record, shall we?

There were too many shady statements to mention them all here or I’d bore you as silly as if you had actually watched the speech. For the sake of brevity, let’s just go over the top 13 things he said that made me snicker, guffaw, or face-palm.

Is Rush Limbaugh going soft or sensible on immigration reform? The controversial talk radio host seems to have changed his tune after talking to 2016 GOP presidential hopeful Marco Rubio on his program this earlier this week.

On Monday, as a group of eight legislators hit Capitol Hill to propose new immigration measures, Limbaugh lambasted the idea. "We've done this before. We've done amnesty before," he said. "This immigration bill that everybody's touting on TV today is essentially the Bush immigration bill that was beat back in 2007."

Anything defined as a "sex slavery cult" must, by definition, be a pretty twisted organization (for lack of a better word), but the sex slavery cult recently broken up along the U.S. border by Mexican officials sounds especially twisted. The name alone is a pretty big tip-off: "Defensores de Cristo." Translation? Defenders of Christ. Yeah, exactly. The group allegedly recruited women and brainwashed them into having sex with a man who claimed to be the reincarnation of Christ.

And what police found when they raided a home in Nuevo Laredo (near the Texas border) proves something incredibly twisted was going on indeed -- women and children living in "deplorable conditions."

What kind of person listens to CNN commentator Piers Morgan talk about gun control and then signs a petition to have him deported? Quick answer: An idiot. Plain and simple. Unfortunately, about 60,000 of those signed a petition to deport the host of Piers Morgan Tonight back to his native England for his comments on gun control.

Last week Morgan called guest Larry Pratt, the executive director of Guns Owners for America, "dangerous" and "an unbelievably stupid man." The exchange was heated (and hilarious), but it was also Morgan's opinion. Something he has the right to have. Yes, even as a British national.

In fact, Morgan's comments are protected under the First Amendment unless they're actually dangerous to our country. Let's face it, even though people are whining about gun control like they're losing their babies, it's not going to kill them. See below:

Senator Daniel InouyeSenator Daniel Inouye of Hawaii died Monday at Walter Reed National Military Medical Center, and will lie in state in the Capitol Rotunda on Thursday. The Senator was a decorated World War II veteran and the second-longest serving senator in history. There have only been 31 individuals in U.S. history, including Abraham Lincoln and Ronald Reagan, who have been awarded this esteemed honor.

Senator Inouye was not just a WWII vet; he was a true war hero. Before he served his home state for over 58 years in Washington, he was a second-generation Japanese American living in Hawaii when Pearl Harbor was attacked. When the army dropped its enlistment ban on Japanese Americans, he immediately signed up. The stories that follow are those of a truly amazing war hero.

Police still don't know the identity of a man who fell from the sky -- literally! -- and landed on a London sidewalk, but they do believe he was dead before he ever hit the ground. And that's a relief. It's a horrifying idea, falling to the Earth still alive, knowing what was happening.

Neighbors said they heard a loud noise on impact, and then they looked and saw the body. Gah. This makes me shudder. I don't ever want an image of that in my mind.

But where did the man who fell from the sky come from?

GQ says its list of the 25 LEAST influential people of 2012 is in no particular order, but I don't buy it. Because really, at the top of that list we find everyone's favorite failed Republican presidential candidate (well, there really can only be one...): Mitt Romney.

And thank goodness! I am tickled pink that Mr. Romney will remain a figure of little to no influence because as a woman (and a human being), I kind of like the "gifts" that Obama allegedly "gave" us. What am I grateful that Romney won't be influencing this holiday season? Oh so very many things.

When it comes to debates, it really is the zingers that people remember. And it appears they could be a factor again in these 2012 elections. Republican Presidential candidate Mitt Romney had some great ones in this second debate. Like when he talked about how if we continue borrowing and spending we are setting this country on "The Road to Greece" and when he turned to President Barack Obama and said, "Have you looked at your pension fund lately? You've got investments in China and the Caymans, too." And oh, yeah, I liked the, "Did he or didn't he call it an Act of Terror in the Rose Garden that day?" Although that one lost a little steam because it is unclear exactly what the Administration did and didn't say those first two weeks. As a fellow blogger said last night, if he did call it an Act of Terror but still kept blaming an anti-Islam movie on YouTube, is that telling the truth or just massaging the release of information?