Like a lot of people, Ranea Crabtree isn't fond of her name. Actually, Ranea's not even her real name. Sheila is. And god help you if you use that. "I think it's really ugly," she said. Ranea has been known to ground her 15-year-old daughter if she calls her mother by the dreaded S-word. Ranea hates Sheila, and while we're at it, Ranea doesn't even really like Ranea. So she's trying to change her name. To Sexy.
"I wear a lot of Victoria's Secret clothes and my husband calls me sexy all the time," Crabtree told Fox19.com. "I really want to do Sexy because it's kinda like my personality. I just love to be adventurous, have fun, and do all kinds of things." (So, why not change your name to Adventurous or Fun, Sexy?)
Ranea has taken all the steps needed for the name change, including filling out paperwork, paying a court fee, and putting a 30-day notice in a local paper. All that's left to do is stand in front of a judge (in Licking County, Ohio, no less!) to formerly request changing her name to Sexy. Some legal experts are saying it's doubtful the request will go through, but if it doesn't, Ranea has a backup plan. "If it’s not Sexy, then I might go for Sparkle," she said.
Now, although completely ridiculous, I don't see a problem with the act, in and of itself, of Ranea legally changing her name to Sexy. It might be weird if you work with her, but she's not hurting anyone or affecting other people's lives, so who cares? The one small issue I do see, though, is the fact that Sexy doesn't go with Crabtree. Sexy Crabtree? No. If Ranea is going to change her name to Sexy, she might have to change her last name, too. To Pants. Or Lady. Or Beast.
And hey, Ranea, if the judge doesn't approve your name change, and you wind up going with Sparkle instead, email me. We can spitball some last names that go with that, too.
What last name do you think goes with Sexy?
Image via Newtown graffiti/Flickr