No. Just no. A thousand times no. A new water slide called Verruckt is set to open in May in Kansas City and, once operational, will be the world's tallest. And it looks absolutely terrifying. Or insane. Literally insane, actually, as verruckt is German for insane.
Insane, terrifying, death-defying ... I don't care what you call this marvel of modern thrill-seekery -- I call it Slide-o-Terror. And this is coming from someone that once jumped out of a perfectly good airplane.
Schlitterbahn Waterparks has released a video promo showing what riders will be able to expect this coming summer. Take a look and try not to pee your pants.
Holy. Crap. How is that not defying the laws of physics? Priority number one in my book when it comes to water slide safety is that my hiney must be kept in contact with the slide! This is so steep it looks like you'd just fall off into the air!
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The park's director of sales and marketing says that people will ride down the slide at 65 miles per hour in four-person rafts, because, "At Schlitterbahn we love rides that encourage people to share the experience. Besides it’s more fun if someone is screaming in your ear."
That is if they can even find four whole people to risk this insanity.
I'll be over in the lazy river with a margarita, thankyouverymuch.
Would you ride this slide?
Image via Schlitterbahn Waterparks and Resorts/YouTube