facepalmCan someone please help out the University of Southern California police? They seem a bit confused about how this how rape/sexual assault business works. In fact, it's gotten so bad that there's a federal investigation of the campus police and school officials into their alleged failure to prosecute rape. 13 people have filed complaints, including one woman who says she was told she wasn't raped because her assailant didn't orgasm.

"Because he stopped, it was not rape," the victim was told when she reported the rape, according to a complaint she filed. "Even though his penis penetrated your vagina, because he stopped, it was not a crime." 

Okay ladies? It's not rape if he stops. So someone can force himself on you, but if at some point he says, "Oh, my mistake! Excuse me while I remove myself here" and he hasn't ejaculated yet, it's not really rape. It's something we call "schmape." Schmape is more common than you think. I wonder what else the USC campus police classify as schmape, and not, you know, rape rape.

I'm kidding about the schmape. It's just... Where do they get these guys? Shouldn't you have to know what rape is in order to get hired with campus police? Would an IQ test be out of order?

Another woman complained that her ex-boyfriend raped her. She even had a recording of him bragging about it. But she says the campus police gave her the old "not my job" line, telling her their "goal was to offer an 'educative' process, not to 'punish' the assailant." First of all, ye gods, they don't even know what their job is (enforce the law???). Secondly, are these people really in a position to educate anyone about anything, let alone about sexual assault?

Then there was the student who reported a sexual assault at a frat house party. According to her complaint, campus police told her and a friend that women should not "go out, get drunk, and expect not to get raped." Well now we know; campus police are there to enforce the law, unless of course you go and get drunk and then you're on your own. Only men can get drunk. If you have a vagina, stay home and stay sober. Alcohol is just for the guys.

So the feds do an investigation and come to the shocking conclusion that the USC campus police are a bunch of stone-age knuckleheads. Now what? There are similar investigations happening at college campuses all over the country. Francesca Bessey, who is part of a group lawsuit, says she hopes it changes how college administrators and campus police respond to complaints about sexual assault. "For me, the technical outcome of the investigation is much less important than the consciousness I want it to inspire among decision makers at colleges and universities nationwide."

In other words, she wants to put these guys on notice. They're doing it wrong, and they need to get educated.

Are you surprised at the USC police's responses to these complaints about sexual assault?

 

Image via Brandon Grasley/Flickr