A really good honeymoon should include a few essentials: a nice getaway spot where the newlyweds can enjoy each other, an air of romance and excitement, and an almost ridiculous amount of sleep and sex.
Should, for reasons that can only be dreamed up on a couple-by-couple basis, either the bride or groom have a brush with the law during the course of their post-nuptial canoodling, it should be for something that makes for funny, shareable stories like public drunkenness or random flashes of public nudity.
It should not be because the new hubs has been nabbed by police for soliciting a hooker right after his wedding night.
Yet that very thing happened when authorities arrested 21-year-old Mohammed Ahmed, a Chicago-area man stumbled up by a prostitution sting when he allegedly solicited a cop posing as a lady of the night—while he was on his honeymoon in Orlando with his brand new, unsuspecting missus. What a way to find out your man is a cheat. And not only a cheat, but a cheating john.
I can’t think of a better reason for the bride—who has to be blushing for a whole other reason at this point—to slide on over to the nearest legal representative faster than she can say “annulment.” Bless her heart.
It always baffles me when someone dishonors their vows right after they get married. Clearly they were cheaters before and, for whatever reason, they either believed that walking down a flower-lined aisle would instantaneously settle them down or they got convinced as much by some well-intentioned family member. Old impulses get temporarily tucked away perhaps, but they don’t die on their own and it doesn’t take long for that old bed-hopping spirit to flare back up.
So my question is: why even bother getting married in the first place? ‘Specially—es-pesh-lee—if you’re little bitty baby 21 years old with a penchant for hooking up with prostitutes online. Seems to me an individual like that should stay a bachelor(ette) a long, long time. Like, always.
Everything ain’t for everybody, and that includes marriage. You have to know yourself and your lane. And if you feel like maybe you might be unable to resist the silent call of infidelity, no amount of coaxing and convincing is going to be able to make it right. Case in point.
How far into a new marriage should you go before you listen to that little voice that says you made a mistake?
Something my kids handmade
A fun holiday at home with my family
Some time off!
Something just for me, like a plush robe